How to Enjoy Your Commute (Or At Least Hate it Less)

When I moved back to the Twin Cities, I went from a 15 minute commute (walking along the ocean) to a 30 minute commute (driving my 22-year-old car through heavy traffic).

Awesome.

So I sulked about it a lot and questioned my decision to work in St. Paul and whined to everyone I knew. Eventually my friends nearly went blind from rolling their eyes so hard and I found a few ways to actually enjoy my commute (or at least hate it less).

• Bring the car up to par. In my case this meant putting in new brake pads, replacing the broken tape player with a functioning cd player (Hello, 21st century!) and finally throwing away all the empty Reese's Pieces bags.

• Stop listing to the F-ing Radio. I really kind of hate drive time radio ... or rather, I came to hate the only radio station available on my old broken-ass radio. Every morning I found myself listening to The Jonas Brothers and segments like "I used to be hot." And then my brain melted and ran out of my ear.

• Listen to something that's actually enjoyable. You know what's exponentially more enjoyable than The Jonas Brothers? David Sedaris! Or This American Life! Or any given book on tape. If you're really ambitious (or a Virgo) you could even listen to language-learning tapes. Your public library probably has all of these. Or maybe just make yourself a really great mix.

• Consider the cutie in the car next to you. That's right, hottie. I'm winking at you. If they aren't flirt-worthy, I like to create a back story for them and wonder what drove them to choose that particular bumper sticker.

• Choose an alternate route to work. I often find that I'd rather drive 25 through a tree-lined, residential neighborhood rife with stop signs than sit in stop-and-go traffic on the highway. I get to my destination in the same amount time, but I don't feel homicidal when I get there. I used the mapquest 'avoid highways' routing option.

Extra credit: engage in car dancing, do kegals, drink something yummy or pretend that you are being interviewed by someone fabulous. I spend large portions of my drive doing this: "Why yes, I have climbed Everest! Funny you should ask!"

How long is your commute? How do you get through it?

In Which We Remember that Our Struggles are Relative

In the event that you were looking for a movie trailer that will tug on your heart strings and possibly reduce you to tears (and really, who doesn't want to spend their Sunday afternoon that way?) may I suggest Moving to Mars?

It's a documentary that follows two KaRen families (the ethnic group that I work with) as they relocate to Sheffield, England. It is, of course, funny and moving and completely engaging. And it reminds me of my grandma's sage advice "If everyone in the world put their problems in a pile, you would be so happy to grab yours back."

Feet + Brain = Success

Happiness Is...

I have accomplished absolutely nothing this week. Unless you count eating lots of processed carbs, periodically dressing my cat in a vest and editing photos in picnik. I'd like a heaping helping of happy, please! Let's make lists of what happiness means to us!

In my world, happiness is...

* a cuddly pile of snoring kitteh

* yelling the lyrics of questionable 80s songs with your BFF, on the way home from the bar

* laying by a pool. anytime, anywhere

* when someone that you've known forever does something that surprises you

* a bowl of bun chay, eaten in the company of kindred spirits

* an empty highway, a sunny day, a great mixtape (yes, an actual tape) and an overly sugary gas station cappuccino

* your plane coming in for landing over an unknown city and the feeling adventure opening up in front of you

How would you finish the sentence "Happiness Is.."?

True Story: I'm an Identical Twin

Yes, that's what they really look like. And they're so nice/smart/funny you can't even hate them for looking like Bond girls! I lived with Carrie (the twin in the foreground of the picture - I think) my junior year of college. Despite seeing her every day, I'd regularly confuse Carrie with her sister Diana when I saw her around campus. Eventually, I just took to addressing them both by their last name. Clever one, me.

Do twins run in your family?
I guess my great uncles on my mom's side were twins, but no, not necessarily. However, for whatever biological reason, apparently women age 35+ are more likely to have twins (my mom was 35 when she had us).

How frequently do people confuse your for your sister?
That depends. Though we do have somewhat separate lives if, for instance, Diana shows up at the restaurant where I work (most people there know I have a twin) and people don't know she's coming, they say 'Hey Carrie!' and try to start a conversation until she informs them that she's not me.

How similar are your personalities?
That's a hard one because to us, of course, we are two completely different people. But we do notice how similar we are sometimes. If I listen to a voicemail that I left on her phone- it freaks me out how much I sound like her. From inside my head, I sound different, but apparently from the outside we are quite similar.

Sometimes when we're having a conversation with someone, we'll laugh or respond in the exact same tone at the exact same time. A lot of times the person we're talking to doesn't notice because it sounds like only one of us responded. To each of us, it just sounds like stereo inside our own head. We usually look over at each other and check to see if both of us had actually spoken or laughed.

My mother says that starting from when we were in our cribs across the room, we've always had synchronized body language. That when we're near each other we subconsciously move similarly, shift our weight at about the same time, cross/uncross our arms at the same time, look the same direction. We also started having "abbreviated conversations" at a very young age. Both parents claim that we had extensive conversations in our own language in the back seat of the car together, long before we could ever speak English or communicate with anyone else.

Over the years, I've had to remind myself to insert major details into stories I'm telling to people other than Diana. Maybe it's because we've shared so many experiences or because we're constantly thinking along the same lines, but we can cover a lot of ground without saying much. I remember sitting in a restaurant with a bunch of people and I heard music we might recognize playing in the background. I caught her attention, looked up, looked back at her with a questioning look, and she nodded. That equated to "Do we know this music and is it from that one soundtrack?"..."Yes it is and we have it at home."

Have you ever switched to confuse your teachers, parents, friends?
Not very often. We did switch classes twice in middle school. Once for Home Ec - not very exciting. But it was amusing to watch it spread around the classroom as some of the other students figured it out told each other. The other time was for English and I remember going to Diana's class and the teacher saying "Goodbye Diana!" as I walked out the door at the end of the period. I walked out into the hall, did a u-turn, came back in the room and she said "Hi Carrie!"

This is slightly cruel, but I guess the only thing we still do is if we happen to be together and either of our parents calls one of our phones, the other twin will answer it and see how long it takes for that parent to figure it out. I think Dad noticed something about how we each answer the phone or our initial voice fluctuations, but we can still keep Mom going for a little while sometimes. :)

How do people react to you when you're out together?
Blonde twins? At the cost of sounding completely vain: they stare. It's like the normal rules of courtesy don't apply and because we're somehow intriguing- they can just stare!

However, when I see another set of twins I stare as well! It's fascinating to see the similar movements and mannerisms of another set of people (and pick out the differences). Which I suppose is what everyone stares at Diana and I for as well. Also, when I see another set of twins I always feel compelled to go up and let them know that I, too, am a twin. And compare stories and experiences etc. When a twin or twin sees us, they usually come up and do the same.

Have you ever had any of those 'she gets hurt and I feel it experiences'?
Maybe, though not strongly. A few months ago when Diana was going through a particularly stressful situation in her life, I would get these persistent headaches. I was drinking enough water, getting enough sleep, exercising, no PMS- nothing to explain it other than her stress. So I would call and tease her to stop stressing out so much!

Have you ever wished you weren't a twin? Or wanted to alter your appearance so we didn't look so similar?
I do remember going through a phase in high school where I didn't want us to look the same all the time. Of course it never helped when we'd each get dressed in our separate rooms not seeing each other, and come out into the hall between our rooms wearing the same thing anyway. What to do?

We've became masters at sharing and cooperating because we've had to. It was and always is nice to have my best friend built right into my life (painfully cliche, but so true). Our teachers attempted to "socialize" us by always placing us in separate home rooms (I suppose they wanted to be able to tell us apart as well). That might've helped, to a degree, but we never HAD to make friends because except for those few hours of school, we were always with the one person we shared the most preferences, abilities, and life experiences with anyway.

Are any of you a twin? Do you know any twins? Questions for Carrie?

Selling Ice to Eskimos

Did you guys know that I worked in advertising for about three minutes before I gave in to my genetic destiny of teaching? It's true. I worked on things like press releases for a Michael Bolton concert and copy for a brochure about cemetery headstones.

So it's pretty much exactly like Mad Men.

But! My dalliance with the ad world gave me a hearty appreciation for a well made commercial. Have you heard of The British Television Advertising Awards? Oh, they are a few hours well spent. A few of my favorite winners?

A marionette pelvic thrusting to an early ninties dance hit?! Yes please!

You're totally surprised that I'd be into an ad featuring a singing sock monkey, right?



What would happen if a life-time nudist came home to find his wife and best friend, together, wearing - gasp - clothes!?

Appropriate? No. Related to clothing? Not really. Totally effing genius? Absolutely?

What ads do you love?

How To Save Up For Big Ticket Items

Dear Sarah Von,
I'm writing is to ask you about saving money for travelling. You see, I'm off in the beginning of March for three months in New Zealand, Indonesia and Sri Lanka. My boyfriend and I bought our ticket on Saturday and I'm getting pretty worried about the money situation - even though we've decided to do it on the cheap. I have a full time job but it pays badly - do you have any tricks to raise money in a fairly short time? Although I'm sure you were sensible and saved up over a long time!

Oh, friend. Yes, I was sensible (and a bit boring) and saved up over a long time. But all is not lost! You can put away a good chunk of money if you're willing to make some changes.

* Get a Second Job
Blowing your mind with my originality, right? But it's obviously easier to save money if you've got two or three streams of income. And a second job doesn't have to mean working every evening and weekend at Starbucks. You could tutor the neighborhood kids, house-sit for family friends, babysit your cousins - there are a million options. Here's an article with some great ideas for second jobs.

I know that working two jobs is a drag of epic proportions. But if you're doing it for a limited amount of time and to raise money for a very specific reason, it seems exponentially more tolerable. At least that's what I always tell myself while I'm tutoring EBD fifth grade boys.

* Put Yourself on a Crazy Tight Budget
Again with the mind-blowing, right? Suzy Orman, watch out! Making a budget is wicked easy: look into how much you need to buy your round-the-world ticket/new car/house/Jimmy Choos, look at how much discretionary income you have, do a bit of math and see how long it should take you to save enough to buy said pair of shoes. If you're not happy with that amount of time: reexamine the way you spend your money.

Surely you can trim a little fat?
*Cancel the cable (that's what hulu is for, y'all!)
*Split wi-fi with someone in your building
*Cancel your gym membership and go for walks with friends or workout at home
*Start cooking at home instead of eating out so much
*Go cold turkey on Starbucks
*Don't drink so much. If you're going to party, pre-game at home so you're not spending $40 at the bar every weekend
*Get a flatmate
*If you engage in retail therapy (aka: are human) why not hit up a thrift store or a nice second-hand boutique? You'll save heaps of money and still feed the hunger for new shoes

My budgeting secret? I allot myself a certain amount of 'fun money' each week and withdraw that amount in cash from an ATM. Once that money's gone, I'm stuck at home eating soup and watching library DVDs until Sunday rolls around again.

*Realize that every non-essential thing you buy is a step away from your dream
Oh, that's a bit dire, isn't it? But it's true, y'all. Before you buy yet another set of decorative towels, realize that all that terry cloth equates to one night in a Cambodian hostel. Or a can of paint for the house you want to buy. Or two weeks worth of car insurance on that Saab you don't have yet. If you want to make these things happen, you have to make them a priority, right?

*Find Sponsors

If you're saving up for something remarkable (traveling to Africa to work in an orphanage, starting your own business, biking across America) there just might be people willing to help fund your dream. Learn how to write grants proposals, start a blog, contact your local paper and see if they're will to write up your story. If you're incredibly cheeky (and clever) you could even aim for corporate sponsorship like Dancing Matt of youtube fame (Stride gum sponsored his trip) or Maggie Mason, whose life list is being sponsored by Intel.

*Remind Yourself Why You're Doing This

Limiting yourself to $40 worth of fun each week and giving up your Americano habit isn't particularly easy or fun. But nearly everything in life worth having requires a bit of work and sacrifice, no? Make an active effort to remind yourself why you're making these sacrifices.

If you're saving up for a trip to India learn how to make paneer, listen to some punjabi mc and rent some bollywood flicks. If you're socking away money for a house, make lists of features in your dream house, stop by designsponge and haunt all those real estate open houses. You'll be more likely to stick to your financial guns when the reason is at the forefront of your mind.

*Sell Your Stuff

Granted, this money making scheme is best employeed when you're moving or about to travel, but certainly there are some things sitting around your house, gathering dust. If you've upgraded to a flat screen, maybe someone wants your old tv? And if you've got a laptop, do you really need a netbook? Craigslist awaits, my friends.

Drastic Measures

*To be employed only when you are really broke or need to save an epic amount of money.

*Move Back in with Your Parents

Twin beds, dial-up internet and casseroles every night for dinner. But it's (probably) rent free. I'm sure you'll save everyone's sanity by helping around the house, not bringing boys home from the bar as 2 am and setting some parameters before you move in, right?

*Teach ESL in Asia/The Middle East

Drastic? Yes. Effective? Definitely. After the first six months when I spent all my money on Ikea furniture and t-shirts with terrible Engrish, I saved $1,000 a month. Really! With no effort and no impact on my swanky quality of life.

It should be noted that this doesn't hold true for ESL in all Asian countries - I'd hazard the guess that you'd have the most luck in Japan, Taiwan, Korea and Hong Kong. Correct me if I'm wrong!

*Take Part in Medical Studies
My goodness but this is drastic, no? I've never done these myself but I have several friends who financed large chunks of college with medical studies - and they still have all their limbs and appear to be fertile! Of course, if you're going to do these exercise caution, do heaps of research and start small.

P.S. I would be remiss in my role as pseudo-financial advisor is I didn't make the point that you really shouldn't buy trips/cars/houses that you can't afford (I'm looking at you, America's housing crisis). I know that those shoes are calling your name, but if the choice is between groceries and green peep-toes, be a grown up. A girl can't live on patent leather alone.

How do you save up for big ticket items? What's your relationship with money like?

Moments of Win

Have you guys joined the fun over at the Moments of Win flickr pool? Really, it's so lovely and so much fun to sift through all those photos of us doing awesome stuff. Also: y'all are damn attractive.

Annnnyway. Here are a few particularly joy-inducing photos and the accompanying stories.

Poetry Groupie
Ahhh... the most perfect beach in the world... Concha Beach in San Sebastian, Spain. After conquering my fear of traveling in Peru, I took a weekend here with my best friend while we were both studying in the south of France. I had just broken up with my partner of seven years, and it felt wonderful to be alive again in such a beautiful place.

Erin E
Completing my previously-thought-unreachable goal of finishing a sprint tri in under 2 hours.

Brittany K
I had been wanting to go to Washington DC since I was a kid but no one in my family would ever take me. So finally this past summer I took a half-day at work and left and drove 6 hours, by myself, to Washington DC. I spent the evening exploring, going on trolley rides and just seeing the city. I drove back that night and got back at 6 in the morning and went to work.It was the best experience of my life and this is the only picture I got of me from it.

Neon Panda
Yes. That is a cheetah. Why yes! That IS me stroking the cheetah. I KNOW. DIE OF LOVE. win. (editor's note: Gawd! Stop living my dream life!)

Lorelei Strange
I was invited by my hair stylist to participate in the Fresche Fall Fashion show in 2008 (Decatur, GA). Once I saw the rather revealing dress I was assigned for the runway, I got an attack of shyness. I was so afraid I'd be older and much heavier than the other models. But check me out! I look great!!!

kortneeboo
This is me, shortly after I decided to, on a whim, move across the country to try out a relationship with a guy I barely knew. And we're still together. This decision has yielded much win. :D

So what are you waiting for?! Join the fun! If you can't be bothered to upload photos or join flickr, just paste a link into the comments and tell us why that photo is a Moment of Win for you.

Changes

Sure-fire Cure for Mid-Winter Malaise

Yes. Buy your pet a ridiculous winter outfit. I promise, at least 20 minutes of laughter will ensue. $6.50 well spent, friends.