How to Let it Go

Are you trying to let it go? That grudge? That bad breakup? That co-worker who stole your idea? I've struggled with all those things, too. Here's how I got through 'em >> yesandyes.org

A story: When I first got out of college I somehow managed to get a rather impressive job as an event planner. And I was convinced this was my true calling – list and plans and parties, oh my!But there was a catch. Of course there was. My boss gave that Prada-wearing devil a run for her money. She once actually uttered the words “You’re not wearing that, are you?”

I was the personal errand runner, the entertainer of her children and person who removed the bun from her burger when she was on Atkins. All of this in addition to spending my evenings and weekends planning parties for the trophy wives of Minneapolis/St. Paul.And after a year of nigh-on emotional abuse, she laid me off the day after I closed the deal on a $250,000 event.

To say that I was livid would be something of an understatement. I carried a deep and abiding hatred for this woman for the entirety of the summer, nursing it like a hobby, allowing it to ripen and consume a bit more of me every day.

But one beautiful summer day while I sulked, unemployed, in my living room, rehashing all the snarky things my boss had ever said to me, it occurred to be how deeply silly this was. This woman had already tarnished a year of my life. Why was I allowing her to ruin my summer? I wasn’t even on her payroll anymore and she was still controlling me.

Ridiculous. So I started the long and slow process of letting it go.

How to let it go (yes, just about anything)

Do something so fabulous you lose track of the anger. Click To Tweet
* Write a letter. Stuff it in an unmarked envelope and drop into the big blue mailbox on the corner.
* Realize that, cliche as it is, that friend/lover/boss probably didn’t mean to hurt you. Few people act with malicious intent. Many people are selfish or emotionally immature, but very, very few are malicious.
* If someone really was, in fact, malicious towards you, realize that they are probably a rather unhappy person with little in their life that brings them happiness. Happy, healthy, fulfilled people rarely try to ruin others lives, right?
* Remember that you can’t control how other people act, only how you respond to them.
* Create your own voodoo ritual for getting past this. Fill a metal garbage can with your boss’s business cards, those awful emails she sent you and a copy of that book that she threw at your head. Set it all on fire to end this era of your life. Douse the fire with a cup of coffee, because you’ll never be picking up her Skinny Half-Decaf Latte again.
* Scream into your pillow.
* Imagine you are lying in a clear, cool mountain stream. Imagine the water flowing through you and washing away all the frustration and dark, twisted feelings and leaving only calm and clarity.
* Know that, possibly, it really isn’t you. It really is them.
* Write it on a postcard and send it to Post Secret.
* Behold the wisdom of your grandma’s cross stitch throw pillow: “This too shall pass.”
* Hug it out.
* Know that your mom wasn’t lying when she said “holding a grudge is like drinking poison and hoping your enemy dies.”
How do you let things go?
photo by: rosen harmens // cc

Ideas I Will Now Procede To Steal

As you guys may know, I’m knee deep in paint and spackle and craigslist furniture in an effort to turn my diamond-in-the-rough apartment into the sparkler that I know she wants to be. I’ve been trolling the design blogs, searching high and low for a bit o’ inspiration. Here’s what’s floating my boat!
Chalkboard doors! So lovely and whimsical!
And more importantly – great for list making.
Piling my oodles of bangles onto something delightful
and appropriately weird. Why didn’t I think of this before?
It’s awesome because it’s like a library and a shoe store all at once!
Is this what heaven is like?
Tiny little biospheres! Wouldn’t this be even better
if there was a wee plastic DINOSAUR IN THERE?!
I love the idea of tucking three dimensional objects
into arrangements of photos on the wall.
Delicate little mobiles made from
things hiding in your junk drawer.
Hanging random things from the ceiling.
I love it!
And the best design element I’ve seen yet?
One very giant dog.
(all photos from designsponge)

Are there any design tricks you’ve been aching to try?

30 New Things: Beer/Cheese/Bacon Cupcakes

 

How would you feel if you knew that your favorite foods could be combined into a perfect storm of deliciousness? I mean, I’m still waiting for someone to develop some sort of dark chocolate/pasta/cheese dish. Nigella, I’m looking at you.Needless to say, I was pretty damn excited when I found this recipe for Beer Cheese Cupcakes with Bacon Cheddar Frosting. Ridiculous? Yes. Possibly fantastic? YES! My girls Darcie and Jill were kind enough to drink a lot of beer and eat all the extra cheese with me as we challenged the belief that bacon doesn’t play well with baked goods.

The results? Goodish. It was all a bit sweet for me and I was only able to eat one cupcake, instead of my usual five, so I’d suggest reducing the sugar in both the batter and the frosting if you’re going to give these a go. But totally worth making, particularly if you want to steal the show at the next potluck you attend.

P.S. Do you know any recipes that incorporate cheese in an awesome/weird way that I need to know about?

Did I ever tell about the time …

I was going through customs in New Jersey? And they pulled me out of the crowd because I apparently looked like a drug smuggling hippie? Please allow me to relate the conversation that ensued.

Customs agent: M’am, could you tell me the purpose of your trip?

Me: Ummm, it was a vacation.

Customs agent: Did you know anyone in Peru?

Me: No.

Customs agent: So you were there by yourself? For three months? In Peru?

Me: Well, I traveled with some friends for a while and then I did some volunteer work.

Customs agent: Uh-huuuuuh. And how did you hear about it?

Me: About Peru? How did I hear about the country of Peru?

Customs agent: Yes Ma’am.

Me: Ummmmm … sixth grade social studies class?

Good lord. What’s the most hilariously stupid thing someone has said to you lately?