5 Ways To Make Your Business Sparkle

This guest post comes to us via the lovely Julie of Olivine's Charm School.  Girlfriend knows about business.  She's owned/operated six successful businesses (including a makeup lines carried at Sephora and Nordstroms!)  Check out her online business small business class A Lovely Venture: Creating Your Charmed Business if you like what you read here!

♥ Write down your goals, desires and dreams for the next year of your business.
Go ahead, we’ll wait...
Do you have an anxiety-inducingly long list in front of you and no idea how where to start?  Perfect, you did it right!
Go through that list and pick out something that seems really juicy and break that task down into itty bitty baby steps that aren’t quite so intimidating.  Stop focusing on the rest of the list and just focus on this new relaxing list. Here is an example from my personal list:
Redesign my store web site home page

1. Email web designer and schedule time to start project
2. Find five web sites that have a look I admire
3. Go through three magazines and cut out pictures that have the feel I want
4. Ask two friends what they would like to see on my home page
5. Make a list of my changes

All of a sudden that task seems totally doable. Do one of your baby steps today!

♥ Make your work space sparkle and shine

 I think it’s super important to have a designated work space that is uncluttered and full of inspiration.  This one is simple: clean up your mess.  For some reason, when my work space looks pretty I make more money.  It could be Feng Shui, or it could be that when our spaces are cleared we feel good.  When we feel really good people want to spend their money with us.  Make a vision board for your business and hang it somewhere front and center where you can get inspiration and re-focus from time to time.

♥ Surround yourself with successful people

It's great if you have a huge group of friends that party all night and go to their desk jobs all day, but now is the time to expand your circle to include as many people as possible that are doing what you want to do.  I gave this suggestion to someone once on a consulting call and she was sure she couldn’t do it because she lived in a small town and there simply wasn’t anyone around that inspired her.  I had her send emails to three people that she looked up to in her field.  She sent simple emails that were along the lines of “Hey, I think what you’re doing is awesome”, which is a very non-intimidating way to send an email.  She now has a circle of online (super inspirational) friends that she checks in with regularly.  Reach out to one person today!

♥ Get over your fear of self-promotion

 I understand, it’s scary and intimidating.  Today is the day to practice talking to yourself in the mirror about what you do.  Come up with your 2-3 sentence cocktail pitch about your business, make it fun and enticing.  “I am a personal trainer” is very unexciting and I would not want to hire you.  “I am a personal trainer and I mostly work with new moms who are trying to get their abs back!” would make me want to hire you and/or tell some friends. 

♥ Turn your computer off, put your cell phone on silent and get a pedicure.

When we are starting a new business or trying to run a business it is very easy to put our self care on the back burner, when in reality that should be at the very front.  Always, always, always make time to do something for yourself daily.  It could be as extravagant as a pedicure or it could be something as simple as taking five extra minutes in the morning to close your eyes and breathe.  Because honestly, if you are following the first four steps then you will soon be lost in a sea of business and opportunities.  If you don’t stop to admire yourself, relax and enjoy the process then what was it all for?

Do any of you guys own a business?  Would you like to?  Questions for Julie?

10 Albums Every Lady Should Own & Replay

This guest post comes to us via the lovely Fajr who blogs about music, style, life and million other great things at Stylish Thought.  Go say hello!

Music shapes our lives. For every memorable moment there’s a song that encapsulates the essence of that experience. For me hearing a certain song takes me back to my first boyfriend or to an all-night dance-a-thon with my favorite girlies. There are albums that changed my life, that got me through bad breakups and made me realize life (and love) is great after all. Here are 10 albums every girl should own, sing every lyric at the top of her lungs and hold each tune in her heart.

India Aire - Acoustic Soul : A beautiful blend of neo-soul mixed with grandma’s wise advice. India Aire’s debut CD let us know we’re not just your average girl from the video.

Carole King - Tapestry: What would a list of albums for women be without Carole King? Carole’s 1971 album still rings true today with classics like “Beautiful” and “Will you Love me Tomorrow”

Pink - Funhouse: Pink is the go-to girl for in your face, don’t give a crap anthems. Funhouse is a mix of Pink’s raw emotion but delves deeper and shows her softer side on lost love and giving up.

Lauryn Hill - Miseducation of Lauryn Hill: Lauryn Hill was ahead of her time musically and lyrically. Miseducation is one of those albums that speaks to every part of your soul and is indelibly etched in our hearts as Lauryn’s greatest work.

Alanis Morisette- Jagged Little Pill: The poster album for female angst, Alanis Morisette’s Jagged Little Pill served you anger, pain and life’s lessons cold. Her tribute to ex-lovers “You Ought to Know” is one every scorned girl has memorized.

Amy Winehouse - Back to Black: With her recent passing, Amy Winehouse’s Back to Black has a new meaning. Her 60s soul and powerful, and often raw, lyrics connected Amy’s pain and candidness with all of us.

No Doubt -Tragic Kingdom: Gwen Stefani is a bad ass Ska-singing front woman. Every woman can relate to being part of the boys club in I’m just a Girl and the main hit Don’t Speak is a karoke fave!

Dixie Chicks- Fly:  Every girl has one Dixie Chicks’ song she can play over and over. Fly is full of upbeat jams including Ready to Run and Goodbye Earl. The Dixie Chicks are full-on girl power with this album!

Erykah Badu - Mama’s Gun: Erykah Badu bursts onto the music scene an eclectic, turban wearing soul sister. Songs like Didn’tcha Know and Green Eyes solidified Mama’s Gun another classic in the cult of Badu.

M.I.A.- Kala: Nobody does cultural mash-ups like M.I.A.  Boyz, World Town and others made catapulted M.I.A. to international star status. Every song has a cultural reference while still managing to make us move!

What albums can’t you live without? What’s on your top ten?

True Story: I Worked In A Sex Shop

This is one of many True Story interview in which we talk to people who have experienced interesting/amazing/challenging things.  This is the story of Deb and her time working at a sex shop in New Zealand.

Tell us a bit about yourself!
I’m a magazine writer, sock monkey-maker, tree-climber and the youngest in a family of five. I’m of half Indian and half Chinese Malaysian descent but believe in my heart of hearts that New Zealand  is my spiritual home. I turned 26 this year but my fave age is 23 because my birthday falls on the 23rd of Jan. For fun I like to dance around my apartment in my underwear, try new recipes and sing-along to anything muppet-style.

How did you end up working at a sex shop?
I was kinda cornered into giving it a shot! I was studying at uni and because I was on an international student’s visa and lacked experience, I couldn’t get any part-time work to gain experience and make some extra money. One day, while I was walking home, I saw a sign in the window of an adult store nearby my flat looking for someone to clean the store an hour a day. It was literally 2 minutes away from my flat so I figured it was an hour of my life that I could easily waste watching TV so why not? (I found out later on that I was the most ‘normal’ out of the all the people that applied! Till this day, I’m still not sure if that’s a compliment. )

What was the day to day work like?
Well, I would go in for an hour at any point in the day depending on my classes and because I did it everyday, I would pick a different section of the store to focus on. Some days were spent wiping down counter tops and shelves, while other days were spent dusting display toys, blow-up doll boxes or DVDs. Oh and I should mention that because this was the seediest adult store in town, we had ‘viewing booths’ (customers could come in, pick a DVD, hire the viewing room for 15 minutes, do their business and leave) so I had to vacuum and take out the trash from those rooms everyday! Contrary to popular belief, it wasn’t that disgusting. I made sure their was always a good supply of tissue and that the bin was close by.

What were the customers like?
They were really regular people! It’s easy to assume that only kinky-looking sex-crazed people would frequent an adult store but I met contractors, mums, businessmen and they were genuinely regular nice people.

What items were your best sellers?
For our female clientele - the vibrators and for the male customers - the blow-up dolls. I remember there was this guy who came in every week, we didn’t notice at first until he came in one day complaining that he broke his tooth from blowing one up and his mum had to take him to the hospital! We then checked our records and found that he’d been buying a different doll each week for around 3 months. He must’ve had numerous blow-up orgies!

Did you ever have any weird or creepy experiences working at the sex shop?
Nothing creepy! The weird/funniest thing that happened was when two nuns (fully dressed in their habits, complete with dangling rosary beads) came into the store and asked to buy vagina-balls. I had to keep a straight face while I recommended which ones they should get. Coming from a Catholic background that threw me a little but I found out later that they weren’t real nuns, they were dressed up to go to the theater production of the Sound of Music!

Did the people in your life know that you worked there?
Not at first! Most of my friends knew but I told my family that I worked at a video store. But when my parents came to visit, I literally told them in the taxi from the airport that this was no average video store. They weren’t mad (probably because they were just so happy to see me - my plan worked!) but I told them that if they wanted me to stop once they’d met my bosses, I was more than happy to do so. My bosses always, always, always looked out for me so I knew that meeting them would put my parents at ease.

Did working there affect your ideas about men or sex?
It affected my ideas about sex for a while. I became so de-sensitized! I had to watch and review porn so I could write summaries about them since we weren’t allowed to show the cover image of the DVDs when we sold it on Trademe (New Zealand version of eBay) so it wasn’t a turn on anymore. On the upside though, it made me realize that everyone needs a bit of outside assistance to make things more interesting in the bedroom so going into a sex shop isn’t something to be embarrassed about! It’s like going to a pet store to buy doggie treats - said treats might not be essential but useful nonetheless!

What advice would you give to someone who works in a sexually charged atmosphere?
Have a sense of humor! This will put your customers at ease - it took a lot of courage to come into the store let alone to ask someone for for help. Plus, speaking candidly can help you find out exactly what sort of help they need and offer said help without embarrassing them further.

You should also always trust your instincts. If someone is making you feel uncomfortable, get out of there FIRST and figure out why you felt that way later.

Do you guys have any questions for Deb?  Have any of your ever worked in a sexually charged atmosphere?

Web Time Wasters

How was your week, friends?  I'm still playing catch up with my St. Paul friends, working on big upcoming projects, recording podcasts and dropping other friends at the airport (and feeling a little bit jealous!) Tomorrow is my 32nd birthday and I'm celebrating with roadtrips, camping and lots of diner food.

Now!  The links!

Boyfriends and girlfriends swap outfits and the results are both adorable and hilarious.

My fifth grade self loooooves this: DIY feather pen, stationery set!

On the Travel Savvy boards we're talking about saving money while traveling as a family, dealing with travel-induced motion sickness and taking kids out of school for travel.

Another great DIY - a vintage book, travel tech organizer

I liked Amy's post on the difference between 'slacktivism' and 'activism'

You guys know how I feel about 'guilty pleasures' - so I was really intrigued by this article about the myth of 'high brow' and 'low brow' pop culture.

Sal's honesty floors me. 

On the Every Buddy Boards we're talking about bar etiquette around the world, dealing with life after being diagnosed with an STD and what we love about autumn.

As an eldest child, Virgo of German descent, I can appreciate Scoutie Girl's post on productivity: the hard ass approach.

Music that makes you feel good.

The high price of looking like a woman

She has paid a heavy price for her joy. In time, the silicone in her body calcified and began to migrate, causing her a seemingly endless series of hospitalizations. At the beginning of July, she was hospitalized for an infection. Her body has been left scarred and misshapen. The skin on her buttocks and legs is discolored, and a lump of hardened silicone the size of a golf ball hangs behind her left knee.“I knew she didn’t have any training, but I couldn’t go to a doctor to get the implants,” she says of the pumper and what drove her to get the injections. “I just wanted to look beautiful.”

How to wear fluorescent yellow without looking ridiculous.

Share any great links you've found in the comments!

Because We Say Awesome Stuff

Welcome to a round-up of awesome comments!  I am never-endingly flattered that such clever, funny, good-smelling people visit my little  corner of the internet.  You're so awesome that you make me blush a little bit.  Let's read some of the great things you've said recently!

When we were kids, my cousins and I used to say "are so" instead of a$$hole. Because as far as we could tell, it sounded exactly the same!
Lovers, Saints and Sailors

The most confusing mix up I've had was when my Chinese students were trying to convince me that Andy needed to eat a fetus so that he would be super fertile and we could have a baby. After a long discussion I finally realized they meant placenta. He should eat placenta. Perhaps ewww-worthy, but better than fetuses!
Mary

When I lived in Spain, it took me a month to realize that my new flatmate was actually telling me not to worry when she said 'tranquila' rather than telling me to be quiet.

Now I live in Germany. When I first arrived here and had my first day on my new job, the boss asked me how I had arrived and I replied 'by car' which made him chuckle. It wasn't until later I realised he meant how had my arrival gone i.e. good, bad...
Jen

How brilliant! So eager to try [making cheese] now. Oh, and I believe that saying "Suck it, Martha Stewart" (or, in Brit-speak, "So there, Nigella Lawson!") is in fact utterly compulsory and vital to the process.
Tilly Mix

It is so important for the self-employed, especially women, to band together to share resources and ideas. particularly in today's economic climate.
Dizzy Swallows

It is so important to know who you are and take care of yourself as a parent and not loose yourself in trying to become someone you aren't. Children learn from what they see and when they see a confident mom who loves and takes care of herself I think it sets them up to treat themselves the same way.
Samantha

All I want in my life is to foof around for an afternoon in Scarlett's barbecue dress from near the beginning of the movie - that green one? Zomg so much FLOUNCING.

Roxanne

How To Volunteer Your Way Around The World

When I was 27, I spent a month volunteering at a wildlife rehabilitation center in Greece.
Not surprisingly, it was magical.

Do you guys know Rolf Potts?  He traveled for six weeks with absolutely no luggage?  He wrote a travel book that's gone through 13 printings and been translated into four languages? His steely gaze might rival Chuck Norris'?  We just did a podcast that you listened to this morning?

Anyway.  He has a blog.  I wrote a guest post on it.  About volunteering while you're traveling - finding the right program, finding the right price and the ethics of international volunteering.  Pop over and take a peek!

Radio Yes Travel Podcast

Here it is!  20 minutes worth of travel insight from Mr. Rolf Potts and Yours Truly.  This is part one of two (because we can both natter on about travel for several days straight) and in it, we discuss:

* How much money you should save before you start your adventure

* Worries about settling down and the affect of long term travel on the rest of your life
* Working while you travel
* Dealing with homesickness
* Planning vs. spontaneity

* Knowing when to move on

For more helpful info, check out Rolf's blog, his fantastic (and incredibly useful) book Vagabonding or my ebook The Wanderlust Workbook.

Part two next week!

Back-to-School Ad Sale!

In honor of my former profession as a teacher (and the fact that I'm a dork who loves school, notebooks, highlighting things and getting answers right) I thought I'd offer a bit of a sale on Yes and Yes ad space for the month of September!

Sponsorships are available in one, two and three month packages and you'll lock in this cheap-o price for the whole package if you buy now.  (this is where you imagine me intoning "Sale! Sale! Sale! Sunday! Sunday! Sunday!" over the top of this post).  All 150x150 ads get a 100-word, 3-link, 2-image write-up as part of a group post and have the option to change out their ad images and write ups each month and three month sponsors have the option of a giveaway. Smaller ads will now be included in the group sponsor post, but won't include a write up.

Some facts about Yes and Yes?

Daily unique visitors: 3,200 - 3,500 a day

Page views: 150,000+ per month

Twitter followers: 2,120+

Facebook fans: 1,380+

Blogspot foll0wers: 2,360+
Google Page Rank: 4
Google reader subscribers: 5,080+

Want some ad space to yourself!  Email me at sarah (at) yesandyes (dot) org and we'll get you sorted!

Massive Mashups

Despite being a white girl from rural Minnesota, I have a very, very big place in my heart for (dirty-ish) hip hop.  Also: indie music. 

For a long time, I feared I was doomed to a schizophrenic ipod.  But then I discovered The Hood Internet; they mash up the likes of Lil Wayne and Lupe Fiasco with Modest Mouse and Passion Pit.  What's that sound you hear?  Why, that's the sound of my dreams coming true.

Have a listen! (Um, but maybe not at work because Lil Kim and Jay Z have dirty mouths)

What mashups are you loving these days?  Does your taste in music ever surprise people?

This Is What A Feminist Looks Like

Friends,  let us discuss the occasionally messy and emotionally-charged topic of feminism.

I consider myself a feminist.  So much so that I almost feel it goes without saying.  Of course I breathe air!  Obviously, I enjoy sunny days with a light breeze!  Yes, I'm a feminist!  Duh.

For me, being a feminist means that I should earn the same amount of money as a man in my field with comparable experience.  If I'm applying for an apartment/loan/job/school and I'm competing against my male doppelganger, I want to have exactly the same chances that he does.  I want to be able to walk through my neighborhood without being followed or harassed.

I like to wear dresses and lip gloss.  I'm not great at reading maps or doing complex math in my head.  Sometimes I get verklempt when I watch videos about animal best friends. I'm also incredibly driven, direct and occasionally too assertive for my own good.  I don't think these traits make me a better/worse woman or a better/worse feminist.

While I think I'm just as awesome as any dude out there, I don't think I'm the same.  I think that (most) men and women are wired differently - physically, psychologically, emotionally.  I know that I, personally, am better at certain things than the guys in my life.  And that they're better at some things than I am. 

Equally awesome.  Good at different stuff.

What does feminism mean to you?  Do you consider yourself a feminist?  Do you think men and women are different?  How?

Beating The 'Is This It?' Blues

Last weekend I guest posted over at the lovely Moorea Seal's blog about how to beat the 'Is this it?" blues.  My advice includes a reference to micro pigs, so proceed at your own risk.

How To Be An Awesome Mom + Still Have A Life

This is a guest post from my amazing friend, Andrea.  She's a fantastic mom and still manages to have more fun and do more stuff than most single twenty-somethings I know.  What's her secret?!

When Sarah asked me to write a guest post for her blog, I was not only honored but also sort of bemused. After all, my life feels so…mundane! I have fun, sure, but it’s of the pretty ordinary variety. But that’s what she asked me to write about…how to have fun in MY (mundane) way. Or, as she phrased it “How To Be An Awesome Mom and Still Have a Life.”

I’m a mom of a precocious, adorable, sensitive and smart-assed little boy, Alex, who is 4 going on 27. His dad and I are amicably divorced and we share 50/50 custody. I’m (hopefully) an awesome mom (Sarah seems to think so, and she knows her awesomeness when she sees it,) and I (hopefully) have a life.

I always wanted to be a mom. I knew this even as a wild-child punk rocker running drunkenly through the streets of Uptown and managing a tattoo/piercing/clubwear shop in the 90s. It would happen someday, I knew. Oddly enough, I didn’t think about the marriage/partnership part so much – that didn’t seem as important. I just knew that someday I’d be Mommy.

I married a good guy, got pregnant as planned, and promptly gave up most of what defined me. I was a Mom, first and foremost, and that was what now defined me. Alex came before my husband, my friends, my pets, the activities I’d enjoyed before being a mom. I didn’t go out as much, neglected my marriage, and became unhappy. I was a mother – I had what I’d wanted. So why did I feel something was missing? Because something was—me.

I failed at marriage but realized I had a second chance at a fabulous life. The trick, I found, is in nurturing your own self as well as the little shadow of you…be Mom, yes…but also give yourself permission to play (semi-responsibly) with the big kids, too.

You CAN balance motherhood, a career, and a fabulous social life with a bit of thought and planning…think of the three areas as the legs of a tripod or, for nerds like me, a Venn diagram. I can focus on one or two of the three, but without all aspects I am never whole. (Please note this is NOT to say that women who are not mothers are not whole – NOT AT ALL. I have tons of friends and colleagues who don’t wish to or cannot have kids and their lives are completely rich and wonderful. But for me, I need the trifecta.)

With 50/50 custody, it’s actually pretty easy. I elected for this custody agreement mainly because I don’t think it’s fair to Dads (or their children) to be solely “weekend parents.” If both parents are able and willing to raise their child(ren), then both of them should GET to. But this also left me with a best-of-both-worlds situation.

One week, I’m Mom all the time. Cuddles and forts and T-ball and swimming lessons and coloring and Play-doh and kissing scraped knees. I love it. I revel in it. I’m good at it. On the alternate weeks, I’m still a mom, of course, and I call Alex every night…but I am Andrea, NOT solely defined by being a mom.  I still play and kiss and cuddle and build forts…but with the grown-up kids in my life. My patient and accommodating friends and dating partners work around this schedule and I’m so grateful for it, and for them.

For those parents who don’t have another person to parent/share custody with, it is harder but still doable. Try this:

* Nurture yourself in addition to your little one(s)

* Find adult interests (new or pre-kid) and MAKE the time for them

* Do things for you and you alone…it sounds selfish but in fact you’ll be a more complete person and a    better parent for it.

* Remember that you're a woman, a friend, and a rock star in addition to being a mom.

I don’t know.  I might be full of it but I think I’m a pretty good mom and I DO have a lot of fun, so I must be doing something right.  What do you think?  If you've got little ones, how do you make time for yourself and the things you love?

Hello, hello August Sponsors!

Artists, thrifters, doctors - oh my!  This month's sponsors are a talented bunch.  Do pop over and say hello to them!

Deer In A Bottle
Hi everyone! I'm Tara and I'm from the rainy, coffee-induced city of Seattle, Washington. My blog Deer in a Bottle, documents my daily adventures in photography, art making, and overall exploration of design and beautiful things. When I'm not doing artsy crafty stuff, I like to listen to loud music, cook for my boyfriend, and lay in the sun with my French Bulldog, Wilbur. I hope you can stop by Deer in a Bottle and say hello!

Moorea Seal
Hello there! I'm Moorea Seal.  I love to keep busy while leaving room for a little bit of daydreaming and gallivanting through the woods. I live in Seattle, Wa but grew up in the Sierra Nevada Mountains of Northern California.  And I spent my earliest childhood in England, playing hide and seek with imaginary friends in the wheat fields surrounding my home.  My reverence for nature, whimsy, and touches of magic show up in everything that I make.  I am a designer and illustrator for Freckled Nest, I have my own jewelry business and Etsy shop, I do freelance illustration, and I make music.

Musings of a Caribbean Princess

Hi there! I am Kyla, aka Caribbean Princess and I am a Trinidadian public health doctor and epidemiologist living in the UK. I created my blog last year to show that women could be serious about academia as well as love girly things like fashion and makeup! I blog about a range of things, including scrapbooking, public health, inspirational topics and filofaxes! But I also tackle controversial or difficult issues in my 30 days of truth series. Recently I have started a Frugal is Fabulous Challenge to raise awareness about money and finance in a fun, non judgmental way. So why don’t you stop by my kingdom for some Caribbean hospitality! It will be worth your while. 

My Girl Thursday
My name is Thursday.  I'm a compulsive crafter, lifelong thrifter, baker extrodinaire, and mama to a seriously wacky Georgia Grace.  As an obsessive secondhand shopper I am inspired to things old and forgotten.  I weave elements of this inspiration throughout my design work and my vintage loving Etsy shop (my fave dress in the shop!)  I blog about these things and more!

And Then She Save

Hi guys!  My name is Anna Newell Jones; I started a spending fast and ended my debt - and you can, too! My day job is as a clerk for the State of Colorado. My husband Aaron and I do some free-lance photography too. We shoot: weddings, portraits, babies, familes, events and anything else we can. I'm an identical twin, allergic to everything outside (not pine trees) and I never met a sweet I didn't like.

Are you interested in sponsoring Yes and Yes?  August was a particularly busy months here on the good ship Yes and Yes - we even ticked over the 5,000 mark for Google Readers followers!  Stay tuned - in honor of the upcoming school year I'll offering a sale on ad space, so hold tight!

True Story: I'm a Stay-At-Home Dad

This is one of many True Story interviews, in which we talk to people who have experienced interesting/challenging/amazing things.  This is the story of Kirk and how be became a Stay-At-Home Dad.

Tell us a bit about yourself!
I am a 28 year old boy. I'm from Nebraska and I've lived here all my life. I've lived in four different towns in this state. I was born in Columbus, picked up my associate degree in Milford, worked in Omaha for a bit, moved back to Columbus, then moved to Lincoln to be with  the woman who would eventually be my wife. I have one wife named Chris, one son named Jupiter, and one unnamed potential child due in October. Things I do for fun include: running, reading, social media, video games, geocaching, and social experimentation.

What lead to your decision to be a Stay-at-home Dad?
The original decision was mostly financial with a side of desire to raise our own children rather than use daycare. The software coding/testing job I had when Chris was pregnant with Jupiter brought in little more than the average cost of daycare in our area, while Chris was the Pharmacy Manager at a large pharmacy chain and made more than three times my salary. I also felt more comfortable raising our own, I think largely because I never went to daycare as a child, and that is just the parenting style I am familiar with. I also looked at it as an opportunity to further my education, so I am working on that as well (during nap time).

How did the people in your life react to your decision?
The closest members of my family have been mostly supportive. At first there were some skeptical looks, however their skepticism has long since been put to rest as far as I can tell. My family also knows me well enough to not be very surprised by any decisions of mine which go against social norms.

Friends have been supportive. My chosen group of friends are mostly  socially liberal, so I expected as much. Most people say things like, "you are lucky to be able to do that." I tend to agree!

Can you tell us about a day in the life of a SAHD?
It is constantly changing, so I will tell you what it is currently like. My son starts knocking on his door at 7:00 or so to let us know that he is awake. Soon after that I go into his room and say good morning.  Then we eat breakfast, bathe, brush, etc. This all takes a one or two hours depending mostly one Jupiter's mood. I am usually doing housework during all of this as well.

After all the morning stuff is done we either stay at home and I do house work while he plays and "helps" me out a bit, or we go out. When we stay home, he loves filling the bird feeders and helping sort the laundry by color. When we go out it is either to find a playgroup or take care of the grocery list. On some Wednesdays we have a playgroup with some other stay-at-home dads in the area. On some Tuesdays we go to the local children's museum for Mom's Club, at which I am usually the only dad.

We have lunch around noon and Jupiter goes down for a nap after that. I use the time to get housework done, study, or (during the right time of year) get yard work done.

When he wakes up from his nap we either have a snack or supper depending on what time it is. Chris is home by that time too, so she is helping out too. Jupiter likes to help make supper too, so anything that he can do to help, we let him.

When bedtime rolls around we help him brush his teeth, change into pajamas, and read a story. Chris and I usually run, watch the tube, or read until we retire for the night.

What surprised you the most about staying home with your son?
One day when Jupiter was about six months old I did a simple google search for SAHDs. What I found was that less than 100 miles from me in less than a month there would be a SAHD convention. I also found a great resource in athomedad.org where I have met a great community of other SAHDs. There is even a non-profit organization, called DaddysHome Inc, which oversees the yearly convention and other resources for SAHDs.

I was surprised by how well organized the SAHD community was. Since we are still relatively uncommon compared to moms who stay home (at least in the Midwest), a lot of us have turned to the Internet to find what our female counterparts find within their own neighborhoods. The result is an excellent database of local dads groups, information for fathers, and a lot of long distance friendships.

Do you ever miss work?  Do you anticipate going back when your son starts school?
I do not miss the 9-to-5 lifestyle at all.

I plan to do some sort of work once Jupiter and potential other child are in school, but I hope to find something that I can telecommute to or, better yet, do independently. My background is in IT, and I am currently studying software development, so it is likely that I will be able to telecommute. I really enjoy being able to work my schedule around what I need to do for my family.

What are the benefits to staying at home?  Drawbacks?
The largest benefit which I can think of is simply getting to watch and assist in my child's development. I have always been interested in the nuances of human behavior and find it very interested to watch those behaviors form.

Another benefit would be the freedom to schedule my needs around his. Maybe this is a drawback for some, but it has pushed me to find the ways to have a flexible schedule. For example, I found the school I did because it gave me this freedom. I do not have to go to class on the schedule of some professor who stands in front of a lecture hall.

The biggest drawback is seclusion. I do not interact with other adults as much I would like. I counter this by going to various playgroups and the occasional "Dads Night Out" with the local Dads group. Social media also counters this quite a bit. I am pretty lively on Twitter and Facebook when I get a chance.

What advice would you give to other guys (or anybody!) who's thinking about staying at home with their kiddos?
The advice I have for other guys looking to stay at home is to reach out to your local dads group or start one if there is not one. Also, realize that there is a social stigma about dads raising their kids. Some people think that women are inherently better at it, but the fact is that every parent learns how to take care of their children. It is something that some new SAHDs have trouble dealing with. I was no exception.

My advice for all parents who want to stay at home is to make sure you and your kids have an opportunity for social interaction with peers.

Do you guys have any questions for Kirk?  Are any of you Stay-at-home Moms?

Web Time Wasters

Snow on Cuba Mall in central Wellington (HD) from Ro Tierney on Vimeo.

How was your week, friends?  Mine was fantastic.  Remember how I moved back into my old flat in Wellington, New Zealand last spring?  Apparently real estate deja vu is my thing now - I'm moving back into the same apartment building that I lived in pre-nine-month trip!  Except this time, the apartment will be a little bigger, with better closets and nicer floors.  Amazing, no?

Okay, Sarah.  Stop talking about housing.  Gimme links.

This is the reality of a fashion editor.  Mary gets pitched weird stuff constantly, here are some of the hilarious, weird, totally unnecessary fashion products people want her to promote.

On the Travel Savvy boards, we're talking about carry-on only travel, our favorite sites to book travel and organizing medication when we're border hopping.

I was really lucky to grow up without major body issues (well, not any worse than the average painfully thin girl with a triangle perm and glasses).  This post on teaching children body positive habits is great.

The ampersand is one of my favorite pieces of punctuation (that and the oxford comma) so I obviously love this post.

I was surrounded by couples who had actively made the choice to be together and I had a lot of time to think. To notice that couples who are happy are couples who actively work to make their partner happy.  Yes.

What to say to someone who's sick.  (hint: not "it'll be okay.")

Holy useful.  The print-out-able, take-along-able 'should I buy it?' card!

An incredibly helpful (and honest) look at the perks and pitfalls of blogger partnerships and product placement.

A blog devoted exclusively to cover songs.  Yes, please.


I really hope you don't have a crappy job.  In the event you do, here are 10 ways to survive it.

Woman I am currently fascinated by: China Machado
Born Noelie Dasouza Machado, the product of 400 years of inter­marriage among Portuguese colonials and the local women in Eastern trading ports like Goa, where her maternal grandmother is from, and Hong Kong, where her Portuguese gold-trader father met her mother.  Growing up in Shanghai’s wealthy French Concession, Machado spoke French in the streets, Portuguese at home, and Chinese to the servants—that is, when the family had servants: In their first occupation of the city, the Japanese confiscated her father’s business and their palatial garden home. The extended family, all fourteen of them, had to move into one apartment.

For the Harry Potter-lover in your life: a Hogwarts Acceptance Letter DIY

Holy awesome.  A Parisian cafe that only serves fondue and baby bottles full of wine?!

I'm disappointed I didn't think of this blog series first: People Are Awesome.

Clutch purse + make up bag + a million useful interior pockets = The Makeup Clutch

Did you find any amazing this week?  Leave them in the comments!

Sneak Peek Alert!

In addition to the 2012 Year in Yes calendar I'm also working on a super cool new ebook!  The topic shall remain shrouded in mystery for now, but I can tell you that it will include quizzes, a funny flow chart and interviews with people who are awesome.  Also: this is the cover image.

I am 100% serious.

32 New Things: Make Cheese

Ever year I make a list of new things I want to try.  Some of them are difficult and weird, some are surprisingly boring.  You can read about my previous adventures here.

It is an embarrassingly well-documented fact that I'm obsessed with cheese.  I pretty frequently eat shredded Parmesan directly out of the bag till I give myself a stomach ache.  And then I vow never to do it again and don't allow myself to have any cheese in the house since I "can't be trusted around it." 

I'd always put cheese making under the heading of "Culinary Things That Are Too Hard For Me" (along with recipes involving thermometers or bone removal) but did you know that making homemade cheese is almost as easy as making spaghetti?  Yes.

My super lovely friend Kate (of Lovelorn Unicorn fame) and her hubby helped me make it one cold Sunday night while I was still in New Zealand.  We used a variation of this recipe:

1 qt. whole milk
1 1/2 c. buttermilk
2 t. coarse sea salt
...
1-2 t. fresh thyme, minced
1 t. lemon zest
fresh cracked pepper

Olive oil

1. Line a colander with a cotton handkerchief or some cheese cloth; put your colander over a bowl.

2. Combine milk, buttermilk and salt in a large heavy-bottomed saucepan and heat over medium-high heat until mixture has separated into white curds and translucent whey, about 8 minutes.

3. Dump your clumpy milk into your lined strainer and let the whey drain out. Twist the cheese cloth to squeeze out some (not all!) of the whey and form a satisfyingly solid little round ball of fresh cheese.

4. Unwrap your cheese, top with olive oil, lemon zest, salt and pepper and serve with french bread.

5. Say "Suck it, Martha Stewart!" (optional)

You guys, this seriously takes less than 15 minutes from start to finish!  I'm going to use this as my go-to Impressive Dinner Party Thing from now on!

Have you ever made cheese?  What's the toughest recipe you've ever undertaken?

Mini Travel Guide: Spain

This is one of our many Mini Travel Guides, meant to whet your appetite for travel with tasty tidbits of advice from locals who are in the know.  This travel guide comes to us from Monica!

Spain is a country of great contrasts. It may seem that it's just beaches, sun, and people dancing flamenco, but there is so much more!  The weather, the people, the food and the landscapes are completely different in each area and that’s what makes the country so interesting: no matter what you are looking for, you can find it in Spain. There’s lots and lots of history, nice beaches, great mountains, cold sangria and awesome parties every night.

Must go

Beach

Spain is known for its great weather and nice beaches. You can lay down in the sun in the Mediterranean, enjoy great landscapes on the Atlantic, or even practice surfing. Spain has 605 Blue Flag beaches - that means we have tons of clean, safe beaches for you!

Granada

Granada is my favorite city: it has mountains, sea, lots of history and the best tapas I’ve ever eaten. Located in Andalucía (the south of Spain), Granada is a place to have fun, relax and enjoy all the little pleasures of Spanish life. The Alhambra is probably my favorite building, so don’t miss it. You may want to make reservations though, since only a limited number of visitors are allowed each day.

El Pirineo

If you want to take a break from beaches, sun and people, I strongly recommend a trip to the North. The Pirineo, in the border with France, is the perfect spot to enjoy clean air, great landscapes and the peace and quiet that can’t be found in a city. This is my favorite vacation spot; the mountains really charge my batteries. It also shows a different side of Spain and its people. And the hiking here is amazing!

Must do

Party

Spain is an open country. People are loud, eat too many tapas and tend to sleep more during the day than the night. It's easy to start the night with every intention of going to bed early and not getting home before 6:00 am! Obviously, it’s not possible to do this every day, but once in a while, enjoy it!  That way you’ll have the perfect excuse to take a siesta (nap). You always know when the night starts, but never when will it end!

Walk

I think this is one of the things that applies to every country in the world: if you really want to get the feeling of a place, you have to walk it. Unless you are extremely tired, or the weather is crappy, forget those tour busses and just walk the city. Of course it’s important to visit monuments and famous places, but don’t forget to take a little detour every once in a while. You never know if the next bar you enter has the best tortilla ever!

Must Eat

Sangría & Tapas

There is nothing better in the world than a cold sangría in a hot summer day. Let me rephrase that: there is nothing better in the world than a cold sangria with yummy tapas in a hot summer day. My advice when ordering tapas is simple: just ask for what the locals are eating. Oh, and don’t be afraid to try anything: I guess some foods may seem gross (octopus! pig’s ear!) but really, you’d be surprised by how good they are.

Tortilla

I’ve tried “Spanish tortillas” in other countries and I’ve yet to find a good one. Really, it’s nothing fancy: egg, fried potatoes and onion (always ask for the onion one, it’s 10 times better!) but, really,  it’s so good. If you can get your hands on a homemade one, you’ll never want anything else in your life (there are a lot of difference from the ones to try in bars and restaurants.)

Churros with Chocolate

This is the most Spanish breakfast I can think of. Churros con chocolate are the best thing to eat when you are coming home after a long night of partying, when you wake up ready to face a full day of walking or in a cold winter afternoon. If you’ve already tried churros, go for the porras. Those are longer and thicker, and taste even better!

Cultural tip

Lunch is usually taken between 2 and 4 pm and dinner starts at 9 pm (at the earliest), although some hotels and restaurants open earlier for tourists. When going out, people usually meet for drinks at 11 pm, meaning the night starts much later than in other countries. Language is not usually a problem if you go to touristic spots, but when traveling to lesser known places, be sure you know at least basic sentences -  just in case.

Travel on the Cheap

Spain is not an expensive country if you stay away from all the tourist-y places. There are lots of bars and restaurants in the main streets and squares charging sky high prices for normal food; sometimes you just have to walk down the street to find cheaper and better alternatives. The rule of thumb is to check the people: if there aren’t many locals in the restaurant, avoid it.

Any Spanish travel tips to share?  Questions for Monica?

Are you overwhelmed with wanderlust now?  Check out my ebooks on quitting your job and traveling the world on your own!  Only $15 for 12,000+ words and a 60-minute podcast!