List 7: Personal Fashion Trends

This is our Sunday exercise in self-absorption, in which we navel gaze and make lists about ourselves. Join the fun!

1) Fifth grade
Slap bracelets and other assorted layering - two different colors of scrunchy socks, double tongued L.A. Gears (!) and, if memory serves, two different turtle necks. How did I even move with all those layers of cotton?

2) Seventh grade
Choker necklaces, my dad's flannel shirts and leggings. Obviously. I didn't have Doc Marten's so I just wore some significantly less cool Eastlands.

3) Ninth grade
I become obsessed with suspenders. 'Nuff said.

4) Tenth grade
I devotedly wish that I was a raver. To that end, I sew my own backpack out of purple fun fur (!) and a pair of overalls out of red fleece. I wear said overalls with a rainbow sweater and piles of plastic jewelry. The BFF will never let me forget this.

5) Eleventh grade
I decide that I have "a curly haired personality" and start getting really tight perms. I have incredibly thick hair so the result is nigh-on afro-ish. I also wear red lipstick all.the.time.

6) Twelfth grade
My everyday uniform consists of pajama pants (sometimes satin), Uggs, seventies men's dress shirts, my dad's sweaters that I've cut off to crop top length. Despite this look, I am dating a golden boy.

7) Freshman year of college
Inexplicably, I wear bandannas constantly. Tightly, like a biker.

What about you?

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Worth

source unknown

This Just In: Not All Guys Are The Same (Shocking!)

Dear Dude is a twice-monthly column in which my good friend, The Dude, answers some of your questions about the hairier sex. Dear Dude is an industrial designer by day and a serial flirt by night. He owns entirely too many bikes and a fairly well-behaved dog. He loves good food, good music and smart ladies.

Hey Dude,
Why is it that once u guys are dumped, why do u keep coming back and trying even w/pitiful emails think that the dumper still is interested even when they have told u no, thanks? Don't u guys have any pride?

Hey nibbles -
Tough question... even tougher grammar and spelling...

Long answer: Most guys (and I think people in general) don’t like losing. If they have something - love, cell phone, keys, a moist towelette - whether they are happy with it or not, want to hang on to it over losing it. Giving it away is different, and better than having it taken away, or losing it.

Are you a heart breaker? Are you easily bored with guys? Are you prone to be in mismatched relationships where he is more into you, than you into he? I’m no professional, I’m just a dude, and I’m not going to analyze you, but if that sounds even the least bit like you, maybe you tend to attract “that type”... clingy, mildly pathetic, immature, co-dependant... In which case, maybe there is more to this issue than you think. Maybe you are “dating down”, and need someone more challenging. Or you need to quit the tight pant, indy music emo guys. Just sayin’

There are enough examples of “against all odds, conflicts and hardship, we can be together” stories in our popular culture, movies and our friend circles that many people are probably convinced that they too can be one of those stories.

To over share for a moment, I was once one of “those guys”. I’m not going to get into too much detail, but the major points are that I was with her for 10 years, married for the last 4. She met someone, and got a shot of that “fresh relationship” adrenaline. She had someone to confide in and tell all the things she formerly told me. I did the pathetic “woe-is-me” calls, texts and emails; begged, etc. I’m not proud, but I was still deeply in love. And it was crashing down around me... the life we had planned and been working on, was suddenly a wreck... or at least horribly off track. I will admit, there were times I wondered if I could go on with life. I did. I have. Life is better now.

Sure, I have baggage, but the simple fact that I am telling this story arbitrarily in response to a question that might well have been composed on a calculator is proof that I am reconciling that past. Making sure it is the past, and not the future. Most importantly, learning from it.

Short answer: No, no pride at all.

xoxo,
Dude

A note from Sarah Von:
About a gajillion times, I have overhead women (or, um, myself) say things like this: "why don't guys ....?" "why do guys always ....?" or worse yet "ugh, boys are stupid!" or "all men are the same."

For the love of Pete. Let's stop this foolishness. It's ridiculous to assume that 50% of the population of the world will react to a given situation in the same manner because they happen to have a y chromosome. Saying this kind of stuff creates an 'us versus them' mindset (which isn't healthy for anybody) and it's a disservice to all the great men out there. When I overhear people saying things like "women are so irrational" and "that's a typical female response" my brain starts to melt with rage. Making giant negative generalizations about men isn't really any different.

I know we've all had our hearts stepped on before and surely that can engender a bit of animosity. But let's resist the urge to lump all men under one heading. I like to think I'm a complex and multifaceted person. I'm pretty sure men are, too.

How do you feel about the 'battle' between the sexes? Do you ever catch yourself making negative generalizations about men?

Notes From The Road: The Magical, Mundane, Miserable

All photos by the amazing Sheena

Something that guidebooks don't tell you is that for every moment of transcendent, "I can't believe this is my life" joy that comes with travel, there are just as many (or more) moments of the mundane and miserable.

I try not to get bogged down in the latter but every time (every time!) I travel, I'm surprised by the hours and days that I spend waiting in lines, repacking my bag and throwing up. Yes.

Some of the most (or least) memorable moments from my trip thus far?

The Magical

* Stalking the streets of Mumbai with my girl Latha, trying on piles of salwaars and harem pants and resisting the urge to buy a pair in each color.

* Piling into my favorite type of cab - the dance party cab. Identifiable by it's custom black lights, glow-in-the-dark idols on the dashboard, pumping trance music, excessive use of hair gel by the driver.

* Discovering 'fresh lime soda - salty sweet': fresh lime juice, carbonated water, sugar, salt. So much yum.

* Discovering the gorgeously crumbling Edward Theater with Sheena. Balcony seating, wooden flip down seats, 70s Bollywood movies for 18 rupees (less than 50 cents!)

* Drinking coffee with Sheena and Haley in a Parsi bakery - all old posters, hexagon floor tiles, high ceilings and slowly turning fans.

* Encountering my first Hijra (India's answer to lady boys) clapping for attention and doling out blessings/curses on the train into Mumbai.

* Taking the train down to Bangalore, listening the the Beatles on my Ipod and watching saris flutter in the breeze of the passing train, white cows pull plows through black dirt, green hills fading into grey.

The Mundane

* I brought my old Nokia with me and I spend several hours padding around my neighborhood looking for someone who will sell me an Indian sim card. I always return hot, dusty and sans sim card.

* I belatedly realize that I need another pair of pants for this trip. I don't want to shell out for a real pair of jeans, but the sidewalk vendors don't have fitting rooms. I spend hours wandering around in the sun, holding pants up to my hips, haggling and making faces that indicate "that's too expensive."

* I discover that my dorm has HBO. I have not had access to non-Hulu tv in five years. I spend the hot afternoons eating Marsala flavored chips and watching 'True Blood.'

* I read book after book after book. I'm on number three already.

* I lust after a reliable internet connection with a fervor I usually reserve for guys with curly hair and big noses.

The Miserable

* Every friend of mine who has traveled through India has been groped or grabbed. I wear sunglasses constantly and avoid eye contact with men at all costs. I am constantly, painfully aware of my surroundings and trying to stay out of arm's reach of anybody that looks dicey. It's exhausting and more than a little heart-breaking.

* I discover I don't really like eating with my hands. When I'm done eating, I hold my dirty hands in front of me like flippers and can't really engage in conversation until the waiter brings the finger bowls because my brain is just running in a loop of "myhandsaredirty myhandsaredirty."

* I remember that heat and humidity make me melt.

* Beggars. Little skinny, barefooted children beggars.

* After a fantastic start to my train trip from Mumbai to Bangalore, I accidentally fall asleep for six hours and awake as the sun as going down. I spend the night tossing and turning and then reacquainting myself with Asia's squat toilet. I duck into the bathroom to upchuck my dinner only to discover that there is a large piece of poop caught in the grating that covers where the toilet empties onto the tracks. The other bathroom is occupied so I have no choice but to stare at a piece of crap and dry heave as the scenery of India clicks by outside. Awesome.

Tell me about your most magical/miserable travel moments!

PS. Do you want a postcard, package or thai blessing from me?

When Karma Comes Round

During my last week in The States, my awesome (<- sarcasm) 1994 Ford Tempo blew a head gasket on the exit ramp of 494. I put up the hood, watched the steam roll out and devotedly wished that the earth would swallow me whole. But five hours later? A kind (and handsome) policeman had helped me get my car off the exit ramp, Dear Dude picked me up, took me to lunch and waited for the tow truck with me, my temporary roommate drove deep into the suburbs to pick me up and my fantastic friend Christina insisted that I use her car for my remaining days in the U.S.

Even though I was fairly annoyed that my car had the nerve to die on me, I was incredibly touched and thankful that I had so many great friends that could come to my rescue when I needed it.

Other people I'd like to thank?

* The little old Vietnamese lady who helped me cross the street in Saigon. This doesn't sound like much, but if you've ever tried to cross five lanes of speeding motor bikes with no stoplight, you'll know how much her help meant.

* My BFF, for picking me up at the airport. About a million times.

* The many people who helped me navigate the Milan subway system.

* The Taiwanese guy who drove 45 minutes to return my (full) wallet and then refused to take any money in return.

* The kind neighbor who transferred my laundry to the dryer, and even filled it with quarters.

* The clerk at my favorite Salvation Army who puts aside dresses that she know I'll like. (And she's almost always right!)

* My Chinese co-workers in Taiwan who helped me negotiate leases, pay complex bills, book plane tickets and get scooter repairs.

Tell us about some instances when your karma came full circle!

Wear Everything All The Time

Sal is one of my favorite style bloggers and one of my favorites Minneapolians. You can read more of her musings on style and body image on the daily over at Already Pretty.

When I wear white, I eat spaghetti. Or drink coffee. Or munch on Cheetos. Or write with Sharpies or open cans of motor oil or serve grape juice to passing children or basically do any and everything possible to STAIN THE LIVING BEJEEZUS OUT OF MY CLOTHING. But I wear white anyway because what’s the point of owning it if it doesn’t get worn?

I am trying to apply this philosophy to my fancy and special-occasion garments, too. I mean, that floor-length, shiny, beaded, chocolate brown bridesmaid dress with the spaghetti straps? I’m not completely sure I can pull that off for work. But my fabulous hats from Audi’s shop, my long thrifted taffeta skirt, my Lily vest, and my brooch necklace? Why should those languish just because they’re flashy, or dressy, or stylized, or a wee bit more delicate than my standard boots and tee-shirts? As many have said before me, none of my clothes are "too good" for me to wear them. If I own something, it should be fair game. Period.

But how on earth can flashy, dressy, stylized, or delicate items get worked into daily outfits?

1. Don’t worry about them: I am an EXCELLENT worrier. Just ask Mike. Or Trinknitty. OK, or anyone who has spent more than 15 minutes in my presence. But I do a decent job of living my life despite my worries, and not allowing anxiety to make me an agoraphobic shut-in. I do my best to apply this philosophy to clothing, too. If I am so worried about ruining something that I won’t ever wear it, I might as well not own it at all. It’s relegated to closet candy and what they hell good is that? If something gets worn and damaged, it can generally be repaired somehow. If something gets worn and ruined, well, them’s the breaks. I realize that’s some tough love, especially when we might be talking heirloom garments or investment pieces … but you hear me, right? You might as well have set your money on fire if you’ve bought a garment or accessory only to let it gather dust.
   
   
2. Create balance: Whatever your superspecial item may be, make sure it’s the only superspecial thing about your outfit. This is particularly important if you’re dressing down a formal garment. Balance is created when you pair that sequined bustier with jeans and a black blazer, or when you wear your gigantic rhinestone bib necklace with a simple tee and black pencil skirt. Make sure there is plenty of casual and commonplace to counteract the jolt of formal and unusual.
   
   
3. Keep rotation light: Although I’m making a goal of utilizing my fancies more often, I’d say one a week is plenty. No matter how dressed down they may be, special, delicate, or formal pieces are BOUND to stand out a little. And I like to stand out, but not every day.
   
   
4. Layer, layer, layer: The more stuff you've got on, the more a formal or flashy piece just looks like part of the mix. And even in summer, lightweight layers can help tone down a loud item. A mondo necklace is much less mondo when it's peeking out from a button-down shirt with a shrunken corduroy blazer thrown over it. A slinky formal dress becomes a sassy skirt when you pile a cowlneck sweater and cozy wrap on top. Those special occasion pieces will be far comfier if they have a wide variety of OTHER pieces to play amongst.
   
   
5. Remember that you're worth it: Again, none of your clothes are better than you. Who exactly owns whom, I ask yas? If you've laid down your hard-earned cash for a piece of clothing, it had better earn its keep. It's something you liked, something that fit your figure and suited your personal style, and it's something that made you feel good. So allow it to make you feel good more than just once or twice in your lifetime. YOU'RE gorgeous and special, beautiful and luminous. Why not wear the items you own that make you feel that way?
   

Do you make an effort to wear your most beloved pieces as often as possible? What are your tips for making such wearings relatively stress-free? Any specific ways to dress down formal items that weren't covered here? Anyone TOTALLY averse to incorporating truly special pieces into daily wear?

True Story: I Didn't Buy Anything New for One Year

This is one of many True Story interviews, in which we talk to people who have experienced interesting/challenging/amazing things. This is the story of Holly and her one-year shopping ban. Nothing new! For 365 days! Impressive, no?

What was your relationship with money/consumerism before you took on this challenge?
Before the challenge my relationship with money was nuts! I spent most of my money within a week of getting paid, I had no savings, I paid off credit cards and store cards only to spend on them a few days later. I shopped without even thinking about it, just wandering about aimlessly and coming home with stuff I just didn't need. I didn't know anything about a budget and even though I have a well paid job I was always complaining about being broke.

What made you want to go on a shopping ban?
In the personal finance community we talk about what's called a "Lightbulb Moment". That's the moment that you suddenly think "Uh oh, I need to change my ways or else." For me it wasn't really one moment but several over a couple of months. I wore something new every day, I was always having packages delivered (I spent up to £50/$75 a month on books from Amazon), I had dinner out twice a week and eventually I realized that all these seemingly insignificant expenses were adding up to about £500/$740 per month. No wonder I was broke!

How did people in your life react to your decision?
At first some people laughed, they knew what I was like and didn't think I'd be able to last a month! Someone even told me they could only go a year without shopping if they were in a coma! I'm glad they were doubtful though, it just spurred me on. Having a blog and writing about the challenge was great. I didn't think anyone would care but the fact that complete strangers were taking the time to read and leave encouraging comments kept me motivated to finish the year. I didn't want to let anyone down.

So tell us about your year! How did you make do with the things that you already had? Did you alter them? Do lots of borrowing and bartering?
I used to have mending days where I would sit and fix all the clothes that I didn't wear because they were damaged (missing buttons, dropped hems etc.) then they'd be all lovely and new again. I didn't need to borrow any clothes because I had so much stuff it was unreal. One day I took everything out of my wardrobes (you call them closets!) and donated anything I didn't need to charity. Having less stuff became a bit of a thrill and now I like to declutter as much as possible. I sold books, CDs and DVDs on Amazon, I donated things, held car boot sales (like a yard sale) and put all that money towards the debt. Instead of spending money partying I had friends over for games nights or movie nights which were so much more fun.

What were the biggest challenges? How did you get around those?
I didn't miss clothes, shoes, bags or accessories as much as I thought I would. What I really missed was reading the Sunday papers in bed (newspapers and magazines were banned too) but luckily I had a subscription to my favorite magazine and I would look forward to it every month. I'd set aside an evening to read it in bed and truly take it all in as opposed to flick through and chuck it on the floor (I used to buy about 20 magazines a month). The worst part though was when I accidentally spilled bleach down my favorite jeans with about 2 months of the challenge. It sounds so trivial but at the time I was distraught, I cried for about an hour. I just had to suck it up and get on with it though.

Did you ever cheat?
I personally didn't buy a single thing on my banned items list during my year without shopping. I did however allow my parents to buy me a ski jacket despite the fact that people weren't supposed to buy me things...very naughty! However, we were going on a ski trip and I didn't have a proper jacket so it was really a necessity and I don't feel too bad about it. Oh, and it was my Christmas present too!

How much money did you save? Are you going to put that money towards anything special?
By the end of the year I had saved about £5000/$7400. I built up an Emergency Fund of £3000/$4445 which is enough to cover my expenses if I was unemployed for six months. I've really come to realize how important it is to have some savings tucked away, it's a real comfort knowing that it's there. I bought my first digital SLR camera and now I'm saving to buy a house. I also have a travel fund which I add money to every month so that whenever I fancy a trip away I already have the funds in place.

What was the first things that you bought when the ban was over?
I wanted to choose something really special that would be a symbol of the whole challenge so the first thing I bought was a gorgeous Nest Egg Necklace from the All Those Threes etsy shop. It's absolutely beautiful and I'm so glad I bought something handmade from a unique designer. I always get compliments on it.

Do you feel that the shopping ban has permanently changed your shopping behavior?
Definitely! I'm way less frivolous and, even though I am allowed to shop again, I always think my purchases through. Savings comes first so as soon as I get paid I transfer money to my different savings accounts and then budget the rest so that I don't go overboard. I try to stretch my money as far as possible so I walk everywhere and cook at home to save money.

Would you recommend trying a shopping ban? What advice would you give to someone who wanted to stop shopping?
If you want to get debt then I would absolutely recommend a shopping ban. Once you start only spending on necessities you'll be amazed to find how much money you actually have. It's important to sit down and make a budget, figure out what you owe, what has the highest interest and tackle that first. If you've never saved before, put a little aside each month and watch it quickly add up. Cutting out small "treats" like a daily coffee, magazines, new lip gloss, takeout food saves money straight away. And remember, no matter how poor you feel, you are probably one of the richest people in the world. Check out Global Rich List to see how rich you really are - I'm in the top 5%, it's a good reminder that we can survive with a lot less money than we think.

Have any of you ever put yourself on a shopping diet? Any questions for Holly?

List 6: Favorite Teachers

This is our exercise in Sunday self-absorbtion, in which we make lists about ourselves. It's really fun! Lists frequently inspired by this awesome book.

1. Mrs. Soderquist
I can't really tell you why I liked Mrs. Soderquist's class. I just have an undefined, pleasant feeling when I think of it. Despite the fact that we had math speed drills which gave me heart palpitations.

2. Mr. Gary Johnson
Because he was convinced my cursive handwriting was The Best Ever.

3. Miss Meckley
RPG involving ancient Chinese society? Shouldn't there be some award for that kind of teaching?

4. Mr Byron Johnson
I sucked at his math class. But I would sit in the back, next to his desk and we'd talk about travel and books and musicals. Inexplicably, I think we recognized kindred spirits in each other - even though I was a punky 17-year-old girl and he was a 60-year-old math teacher.

5. Mrs. Lofgren
Because she read The Great Gatsby aloud to us. With voices.

6. Prof. Jim Gremmels
For some reason I got into his Herman Melville senior seminar during my freshman year of college. He kept his dog-earred copy of Moby Dick in a leather bible case and once announced that when he got too old to enjoy life, he was going to stumble out into a blizzard with a bottle of Jim Beam.

7. Professors Dwight and Jeanne Purdy
Lovely, supportive, hilarious. The first teachers to tell me that I should think about going to graduate school

8. Prof. John Macalister
He wore matching scarves and sweaters, loved Harry Potter and didn't suffer fools. My people.

Now you!

Thoughts on Running

source unknown

Scenes From A Classroom

For the last two and a half years I taught English as a Second Language to Southeast Asian refugees in St. Paul, Minnesota. It was approximately as rewarding as you'd imagine (very) and paid about as much as you'd guess (not much). Regardless of the latter, it was probably my favorite job to date.

Yes, it was even better than the internship at the ad agency where I got free tickets to a Michael Bolton concert.

Teaching this group of students was heartbreaking, humbling and frequently hilarious. Some favorite moments you say?

* During break time I hear roars of laughter from the break room. When I poke my head in, I see one of my most gregarious students miming what appears to a wrestling hold. When I ask her what she's doing she says "I'm telling them about the first time my husband loved me."

* I take my students on a hike through a state park where we see a tree that has been downed by a beaver. I try to explain this to them, using the universal gestures for "rodent-y teeth" and "swimming" and "big tail." They are completely unconvinced by what I've just attempted to explain. Eventually, the conversation degenerates into me telling them that a "rabbit fish" ate the tree to make a house. At this explanation, they nod knowingly.

* During a discussion about the opening of hunting season, one of my students announces that he doesn't like hunting. "When the Vietnamese shoot at me, I feel afraid. I do not want to shoot at the animals, I do not want them to feel afraid." He will, however, gladly eat any thing that you shoot at.

* I get a batch of students who are completely new to America. We spend a good week talking about manners and appropriate questions and comments. I am convinced that things have gone well until one of the students announces in perfect English "Nara, you need to exercise. You are too fat. Big stomach, you."

* Many of my students spent their formative years living in the jungle, hiding from the Burmese army. One of my students didn't really see 'civilization' until she was 15 years old. The first time she saw a car? "I thought it was a big turtle!" she yells with a laugh. "And I see the tv, I think 'Where are these tiny people from? Why do they live inside this box? Where do they go when I push the button and the box is black?'"

Are any of you teachers, ESL or otherwise? Share your best classroom stories!

Notes From The Road: Bombay Days

When I left for this trip, I was oddly concerned that I had lost my sea legs. It's been a year and a half since I slept in a barn in Bolivia. What if I forgot how to navigate airports all of a sudden? And what if I spontaneously became afraid of tuk tuks and unknown vegetables? And maybe I'd forgotten how to haggle!?

Not so.

I also, apparently, still retain my ability to fall asleep on a 15 hour flight, sitting in that God-forsaken middle seat, between two men intent on monopolizing the arm rests. Never fear, friends. With some exaggerated sighing and pointy elbows I was able to wrestle back my share of armrest real estate.

After mistakenly filling out my landing card in red ink (unacceptable!) I wandered out of the Mumbai airport to find my sweet friend Latha waiting for me. We ducked into a tiny cab and began winding our way through the Dusserha revelers. We made it to Latha's lovely flat in Bandra where I promptly passed out on her couch. And then woke up at 6 pm the next day.

I wandered around Bandra, checking out the promenade and the million lovers canoodling along the rocks. I successfully navigated the ATM, woefully misunderstanding the exchange rate and withdrawing what I thought was an epic amount of money, only to later discover was actually $50.

Late that night Latha, her husband and I went out for dinner, where in I had the mildest version of curry that easily equated to a Minnesotan's "super extra spicy." We gossiped about blogs, discussed the Indian head bobble (it doesn't mean yes or no) and that bit in Slumdog Millionaire where the kid is blinded to become so he'll be a more successful beggar (sadly, based in fact).

Today, I took a taxi into downtown Mumbai to meet Latha and a friend for lunch and practice my haggling/ignoring skills. Thus far I am an excellent ignore-er.

I bought my first salwar kameez and successfully fought the urge to buy the harem pants in every color. They're the love child of skinny jeans and our harem pants-style shorts and I'd love to wear them all with a ribbed tank, a pile of long, skinny necklaces, cute leather sandals and a big cuff of a bracelet.

Sadly, wearing them without the accompanying tunic is culturally inappropriate here - the equivalent of wearing your jeggings with a cropped top and pretending it's an outfit. And I'm not that girl.

Next week: 24 hour train ride down to Bangalore! It's going to be just like The Darjeeling Limited, right?

P.S. Do you want a postcard, package or thai blessing in your name while I travel?

Network of Nice Hook Ups!

If you're new to Yes and Yes, this is our once-monthly sharing of love, expertise and good karma. Ten readers write in about hook ups that they're looking for and other readers help them out. And some readers even write in volunteering their own area of expertise. Isn't that sweet?

And a gentle reminder: if you're looking for a hook-up and someone is nice enough to email you offering you advice or input, for the love of Pete, please email them back.

I need a buddy in Vancouver, BC
I live in Vancouver, BC. I'm an international student at UBC (from Colombia) and I love going to concerts, art galleries, movies, etc. But I often can't go because my friends aren't really into that sort of stuff. I sometimes go alone, but it would be nice to find a buddy to explore different things with! So if you would be interested in meeting up and maybe seeing if we have similar taste in music, or want to try new things every once in a while, e-mail me!
dianasof(at)gmail(dot)com

I need a contact/couch in Barcelona
I'm traveling through Barcelona Nov 3 -17th and I need a hookup! After an unfortunate rental-car-towing incident during my first stop in San Francisco, my travel budget has depreciated considerably. I'd love a couch or floor to crash on, a friend to show me around or some part time work (I'm a stylist!). I'm lovely and laid back and I'll tell you your butt looks great in those jeans!
painfullyhip (at) gmail (dot) com

I need help finding an apartment and internship in Paris
I'm a high-school student with a passion for life & new adventures. In the summer of 2011, I would love to find a way to rent an apartment in Paris for about 4-6 weeks and find an internship of sorts, preferably in a journalistic or environmental capacity. I have been learning French for 5 years and finished the AP course last year. If someone could help me find a cheap way to stay in a nice & safe neighborhood or hook me up with some possibilities to do some learning/exploring/working in Paris on my own,I would love the advice so much. Honestly, anything you could tell me about Paris, especially from the perspective of a young lady traveling alone, would be awesome. It's quite intimidating to plan such an adventure for someone so young, but, hopefully, I'll be able to pull it off with some responsible planning & help from smart people. Thanks!
d (dot) lapidous (at) gmail (dot) com

I need to meet cool people in Singapore
I'm in my final semester studying Politics and History. Now that I'm graduating, I kind of regret focusing so much on my grades and not hanging out and socializing more. So I've made it my goal to be more sociable and make new friends, especially since I'm generally a pretty shy person. I love reading (all genres!) and I collect interesting song covers.
krystallization (at) gmail (dot)com

I need help getting shoes shipped to the U.S.
I am desperately seeking shoes from dinsko.se which sadly do not ship to the U.S.! I wish there was a global courier service that would purchase and ship; FedEx cannot pay for an item. I would be happy to ship something from Los Angeles in return!
writejoyboy (at) gmail (dot) com

I need to meet people in Salem, Oregon
My name is Kirsten, and I'm new in Salem, OR - I'm 23 - I love great beer, good food, and trying new places to go out - I like getting out and exploring strange/unique places, conversely, I'm a huge fan of girls' night in watching chick flicks featuring Hugh Grant (or even CARY Grant...please, and thank you.) - My husband and I love playing board games, card games, bananagrams...we love games. I crochet, paint, sew (not well) and I have an addiction to books. I wear Silly Bandz. I can't dance. I wear flip flops during the winter.
kirsten.anneke (at) gmail (dot) com

I'm looking for donations of knitting needles, crochet hooks, and skeins of yarn
I'm a college student leading a volunteer organization called "Stitches for Peace." We meet weekly to knit and crochet so that we can sell our projects and donate the proceeds to a cause such as the Heifer Project which promotes a better life for others and a better world for us all. We had a massive amount of people join our group this year (member numbers going from 6 to 93!!!) and I'm looking for donations of knitting needles, crochet hooks, and skeins of yarn so that I can supply my group for the coming year
rb_373 (at) yahoo (dot) com

I need to know about pregnancy and Graves' disease.
I am 31, have Graves' disease, and am contemplating a baby within the next few years. I am currently on a small dose of PTU and am nearly euthyroid, but have not reached remission. I would like to hear the experience(s) of any readers who have been able to have children despite this condition. I'm not seeking medical advice, just thoughts from someone who's experienced it first-hand.
fawnfable (at) gmail (dot) com

I need to know about traveling through Ireland
I am planning on going to Ireland this year sometime in Feb/March- it's on my life list! I will probably go for a week or two and spend part of my time with a friend and part of the time exploring alone. I have absolutely NO idea where to go beyond Dublin however and when I start looking I get overwhelmed. In my brain I have daydreams of making friends with the entire pub in a little town and enjoying a cup of tea while I gaze off some beautiful cliffs. Basically, I'd like to get a good representation of Ireland and it's culture without taking guided tours or getting lost 80 times a day! If someone has been there or lives there I would love to hear from you!
laurlala (at) hotmail (at) com

I can hook you up!

I can tell you about getting through college with mental health issues or a disability
I would be honored to talk to them and offer support. There are so many ways to get help and reaching out is one way. I suffer from Bipolar disorder and have a slight physical disability. I'd love to share my experiences and to help others deal through friendship.
jomercedesg (at) gmail (dot) com

I can tell you about taking the GRE and moving to the U.S. for grad school
ranjita_1514 (at) yahoo (dot) com

I can tell you about working for non-profits, how to become a paid historical rein-actor and working as an actress
mjhrich at gmail dot com

I can give tips on driving to Alaska from lower 48, and moving and living in Alaska
Especially if someone is doing it SOLO, like I did!!
karedavidson78 at gmail dot com

I can give advice on visiting Los Angeles, cooking, traveling to Ireland for a vacation and living with a congenital heart defect.
glassofwin (at) gmail (dot) com

I can talk to you about Catholicism
If there are any readers interested in Catholicism, whether just questions or actually converting, I'm a sane, well-adjusted college student who is studying the religion for a degree. anything from concrete questions (what the heck is that piece of bread?) to abstract (why the heck are you Catholic? what's it like?), I'll answer anything!
sfmongan (at) gmail (dot) com

I can answer your questions about getting tattoos
novarella (at) gmail (dot) com

I can help with talking things through with people
Especially dealing with having a hard time being a stepmom/second wife/recently divorced. Ive done all three!
katerowan (at) idreamloudly (dot) com

I can help you improve your diet or go vegetarian/vegan
I'm currently studying to become a certified health coach and I can offer assistance and advice. I can also definitely help Junk Food Veg*ns.
hungryvegantraveler (at) gmail (d0t) com

I can give tips on traveling within Poland (and most of Europe for that matter), and can try to answer questions for anybody interested in doing medical school in Canada.
michelle (dot) dickinson (at) gmail (dot) com

I can be your friend in NYC and show you around
I know it can be hard to move to a new city, and even harder to meet new people. If anyone has moved to New York City (or the surrounding boroughs) I'd love to show them around and take them out with my girls!
erindepew (at) verizon (dot) net

I can tell you about getting into veterinary school
I have become an expert over the past year on: "leaving the suffocating job that pays well to go back to school to finish up pre-reqs to be able to apply to veterinary programs this fall."
Need to chat about post-baccalaureate programs? Moving far away from family? Navigating the vet school admissions process? Writing a killer personal statement? Taking the GREs? That's ME!
sestabro (at) uvm (d0t) edu

I can help you start an environmental program at your high school
Hi! I'm a high-school student in the San Francisco Bay Area, and I can give a hook-up to any students out there looking to make a change. As a sophomore, I co-founded a growing network of schools installing smart energy systems for the benefit of the environment, and I know a lot about starting a huge project all the way from "why the hell not?" Especially if you have a passion for the environment, I'm in touch with a bunch of organizations that are looking for people like you, and I can advise you, ask you the right questions, and generally support you in launching your radical idea (it doesn't really have to be environmental, starting crazy projects is my overall thing). in case you want to just chat without the pressure of launching a movement, I love food & would love to hit up all the great ice cream places in SF with you... if you're not a creeper, that is. :) Let's start something cool!
d (dot) lapidous (at) gmail (dot) com

I can help you with single mom stuff and tell you about teaching English in Japan
jas (at) dardoandme (dot) com

Have you had any success with the Network of Nice? If so, share with us!

It's Okay To Be Awesome

Guest blogger ALEXANDRA FRANZEN has been lauded as "Spock, but with a sense of humor. And better hair." At the mo', she's co-writing a digital book called "Lifescripts for Hustlers." Contribute your "I-dunno-what-the-eff-to-say" story, and get a copy of her Personal Branding Toolbox as a "muchas gracias" gift.

It’s OK to be awesome.
In fact, it’s preferable. Highly-recommended. Perfect 10s across the board.

It’s OK to be the smartest, the cutest, the sassiest, the brassiest, the best-dressed, the most well-versed AND the most ambitious person in the room.

It’s OK to know exactly what you want and to GO for it — guns a-blazing, Lady Gaga-style.

It’s OK to be an artist, writer or performer, and NOT be poor.

It’s OK to quit your day job.

It’s OK to have dreams that make no sense to the casual observer — and to actualize them.

It’s OK to kick everything to the curb and start from scratch.

It’s OK to be a Jack of All Trades, and a Master of ALL.

It’s OK to be a supernova.

It’s OK to be sought after.

It’s OK to spend more time packing the perfect bento box lunch than actually eating it.

It’s OK to take more than 2 weeks of vacation per year. Much, much more.

It’s OK to spend a lot of time, energy and money improving your mind, body and soul.

It’s OK to be the life of the party.

It’s OK to love so fiercely it hurts.

It’s OK to be legendary.

It’s OK to surround yourself with people who are just as awesome as you are … and maybe ever awesomer.

It’s OK — really, truly, honestly — to be awesome.

What makes you awesome?

True Story: I Was A Lady Cab Diver

This is one of many True Story interviews, in which we talk to people who have done interesting/amazing/challenging things. This is the story of Mara and her summer driving cab in Massachusetts.

What made you want to be a cab driver?
Somewhere along the way, driving a cab became a little bit of a family business. My sister started driving when she was 18, about four years ago, and the other sister followed in suit. I started driving, so that I could spend more time with them during the summer months when time is short on Cape Cod, because everyone is so busy working all the time! I figured, if we worked together, we would get to see each other more often.

Also, the company that I used to cab for is run and operated by all of my childhood friends, more of a family than a business, and the camaraderie was so infectious. You are driving at all hours of the day and night, so you really start to value and depend on the people you are working with. Mercedes Cab is essentially a rag-tag group of crazy kids who work 12-18 hours a day and love one another unconditionally.

How did you go about applying for the job? Was the application/interview process any different than that of other jobs?
I was basically gifted the job, based on the fact that my sisters are awesome and they had proven to be kick-ass cab drivers. The only real application process was applying for my cab license - which in Provincetown, MA requires a yearly check-up to make sure you are fit to drive, filling out the application, paying the fee, and appearing in front of the town's licensing board. It is difficult to get a license if you have prior driving infractions, a criminal record, or (since it's a very small town) a bad reputation. Going in front of the board was a little scary for me, but mostly they just ask you to locate a street in town and make sure you haven't done anything that would count against you. Baby sister and I went together to appear in front of the board, and all was squared away quickly, allowing me to be merrily on my way with a cab license in hand.

Which city were you driving in? Did you know the city really well before you started driving?
I was driving in Provincetown, MA, with occasional trips up the Cape or to Boston. Learning my way around the "city" - 3 mile/3 mile town, should have been easy as I grew up here, but there are so many secret little roads that you have to learn! I kept a sneaky little map that I could refer to on my own, so as not to sound like a moron, but you also have a dispatch office that you can consult when you're lost. I hated radioing in when I didn't know where I was going, but had to do it on more than a million occasions, particularly when you are looking for a little hotel/guest house.

How much money did you usually make in a day?
This really depended, but mostly, driving a cab was good money because your shifts were so long. Obviously, it was better on holidays or busy weekends or when it was raining - customarily though I made about $150-200 a shift. HOWEVER, I was on the bottom rung for shifts, and the better shifts, such as Friday or Saturday nights were better money. Unfortunately, a good indicator of the fact that this wasn't a good job for me was that I hated working all the "good" shifts as they interfered with the nights that I liked to go out dancing! Priorities, priorities.

What were you co-workers like? how did they react to you?
Cab driving is a fairly male dominated occupation, though the cab company that I worked for had quite a few girls driving for it. Since we are in a small town, it is a relatively safe job, which I think is the fear for many about women driving cabs in big cities or really rural areas. There were occasions that I felt unsafe, but you just have to dig deep, feel tough, and act like nothing scares you.

Most of my co-workers were kids ages 18-26, though there were a few adults who worked for the company. The people who reacted the most strongly to my both being young (24 at the time) and female were my fares, who frequently commented about how young and girly I was. They didn't want me to lift up their suitcases or expected me not to know how to drive a car (ludicrous) because I was a woman. One time I went to pick up a rather intoxicated man who wouldn't get in the car with me because I was a girl.

Can you tell us about some of your most noteworthy riders
Well, there are many noteworthy fares throughout the course of the summer, but the people who you most often remember are the ones who either tip you a lot or treat you really badly. I had my fair share of drunk boys who would try to reach their hands around the seats and touch you while you are driving them home. I would ordinarily laugh it off, but if it got really out of hand I would threaten to kick them out :) Never came to that though.

The biggest tipper I had that summer was one such case, where I was driving these three really, really drunk boys home at 2:30 in the morning, and were COMPLETELY out of hand. Whenever they did something atrocious, the most sober of the friends would hand me another twenty. I ended up making $120 on a $60 fare - totally worth it for all of the shenanigans. The most famous person that I drove was Jennifer Coolidge [Stifler's mom in American Pie], but it was a very brief interaction.

What are the tricks of the trade?
I would say that the tricks of the trade are: if you don't have a fare, STAY PUT - people will come to you as long as you make yourself visible. Moving around and looking for the best fare just ends up biting you in the end. Always have change, you don't want to loose part of your fare just because you can't make change. Don't text and drive - it's dangerous and your fares don't like it. Bring healthy snacks, otherwise you end up eating pizza and milkshakes all day long. Bring a book and don't waste your money on magazines. Be efficient, move quickly, but remember that you are in a moving vehicle and you must drive safely. Keep a map on hand so that you can keep stupid questions to a dull roar.

Are you still driving?
I'm not driving anymore, because it doesn't fit into my schedule this summer as the shifts were too long to work doubles, ie. if you know that you are going to be at work the next morning, working until 2 or 3 AM is painful and exhausting. Also, I learned a valuable lesson about myself while I was driving cab - I am not the kind of person that is good at work/playing. Cab driving is all about half working and half socializing. I've learned that I am much happier when I go to work and work hard for a shorter period of time, and THEN socialize. However, it was a really fun job, and perhaps I will pick it back up at some point.

What advice would you give to someone who's interested in becoming a cabbie?
Pay attention to your intuition, if a situation feels strange, or you don't want to pick someone up - don't. That is probably the most important piece of advice. Also, work for a team that you can trust and who will have your back if something bad happens. You want to have a solid crew of people around that you can depend on. Don't just look at the money, you have to remember to be safe. When you are driving cab, the promise of more and more cash can be alluring, BUT you have to stop and rest so that you can ensure that you are driving safely and responsibly.

Have any of you ever driven cab? Any questions for Mara?

List 5: Favorite Cartoon Shows

This is our exercise in Sunday self-absorbtion, in which we make lists about ourselves. It's really fun! Lists frequently inspired by this awesome book.

1. Scooby Do
Anthropomorphism? A team of friends solving mysteries and going on adventures? Stop living my dream life!

2. He-man
Upon further inspection, I'm not entirely sure why I loved this show so much. I even had a He-man beach towel when every other girl my age had a Barbie one!

3. Recess
So awesome, so funny. I think I kind of wanted to be Spinelli. Even though I was a teenager when this show was on.

4. Duck Tales
Tales of daring, do bad and good, indeed!

Note: I was only allowed to watch one hour of non-educational television each day growing up, so my knowledge of cartoons is limited. Also, anything involving anime stresses me out. Why are your eyes so big? Where is your nose? And when you get angry, why are you spontaneously flying through the air and sweating? I don't appreciate that.

Now you!

Travel Theme Song

I do believe that this is the theme song for my trip. Even better that comes via Minnesota's own Cloud Cult, right?

In Which I Talk Too Much

one time, I went to Fiji and held a baby sea turtle.
And then I died of happiness.

In the event that you want to know what I ate in Peru, what I'm packing for my up-coming trip and what things make me say 'No and No' perhaps you'd like to take a peak at my interview with The Hungry Vegan traveler?

In Which We Live The Dream

Friends,

At 2 pm tomorrow, I'm boarding a plane for Mumbai and seven months of travel. I'm 95% out-of-my-mind excited 5% please-don't-mug-me-or-lose-my-luggage anxious. Things here at Yes and Yes will continue as usual - True Story interviews, guest posts from some of your favorite bloggers, Notes From The Road, podcasts and Real Life Style Icons. And maybe some more cute tiny stuff. And some anthropomorphism.

Don't worry! Your daily dose of Yes and Yes will still be here! Steaming and hot and too-perky-for-a-Monday-morning.

This trip is something of a dream for me. India has long been on my 'Top 5 Travel List.' And hanging with hill tribes in Thailand? Hiking in Nepal? Hellz Yes. More than a few people have patted my arm with wide eyes and said "You're so brave! I could never do that." or "You're so lucky! I wish I had the time/money/freedom to travel."

You guys? At the risk of going all Tony Robbins on you, we're all brave enough. Almost all of us have enough time/money/freedom to do the things we want. It's a matter of making your dreams a priority.

I am not, in any way, braver/richer/smarter than any other lady out there. I'm terrified of flying fish and had to give myself a pep talk before I ate alone at a fancy restaurant. I saved the money for this trip on the salary of a teacher who works at a non-profit (approximately $2). I attended state schools and once thought Vietnam was an island. I made this trip happen by making a budget and sticking to it, traveling through cheap countries, and staying with friends.

So. If little ol' me can do it, so can you.

What dream are you working on?

Got the travelbug?  Check out my ebooks and podcasts on making longterm travel a reality!  Only $15 forpetessake!

An Adorable Necklace! For You!

I'm a total, total nerd for books. I will very happily talk your ear off about Tim Winton and Michael Ondaatje and Joyce Carol Oats. So I obviously love this necklace. It would help identify me as a true bibliophile - I mean, if my Vonnegut t-shirt isn't clue enough.

If you're a book lover, too and would like a chance to win this lovely piece, pop over the Finest Imaginary and then leave a comment telling us what your favorite book is!

Round Up of Cute!

Since I'm getting ready for my epic trip, I'm more in the business of Getting Rid of Stuff than Amassing More Cute Stuff. But that doesn't stop me from perusing the interwebz for hours on end, adding cute thing after cute thing to my favorites list.

But if I can't buy all that cute stuff, maybe you can! And then you can lend it to me when I'm not living out of a backpack.

P.S. I have a soft spot for handmade stuff under $40 and made in my home country.

I always want to wear turquoise but I usually feel a bit too
granola/art professor in it. But I think I could swing these earrings! $15

I would like my next apartment to have a properly sized sink
so I can validate purchasing this awesome mushroom soap dish. $12.

This vintage train case would probably make for more
stylish travel than my maroon hiking backpack from REI. Maybe. $27.

Isn't this garland great? You could use it for birthdays!
And housewarmings! And Christmas! $30

Oh, but I would love to add this adorable
vintage perfume bottle to my lady closet vanity. $18

I'm pretty sure if you buy this sweet little wolf,
you'll automatically be The Favorite Aunt. $20

Do you buy handmade? What cute things have you found online lately?

All Things Splendid

Dear Dude Answers Your Questions!

Dear Dude is a once-monthly column in which my good friend, The Dude, answers some of your questions about the hairier sex. Dear Dude is an industrial designer by day and a serial flirt by night. He owns entirely too many bikes and a fairly well-behaved dog. He loves good food, good music and smart ladies.

Hey Dude,

I am the firm believer that if a guy doesn't text you back straight away or doesn't make the effort to text all the time, he's not interested. But meeting with a guy last night who I explained all my woes to, said that things aren't always that straight forward and that maybe I should give them the benefit of the doubt? And he proceeded to offer explanations as to why certain guys recently hadn't been in touch.

I just don't get men!

Hey Fair Maiden -

Heehee, you said "firm".

I am not 100% certain what your question is here... If a guy fails to text back straight away (meaning, immediately?), has he lost interested? Not necessarily... Should you give guys that are slow to text the benefit of the doubt? Maybe... Can I be more vague? All signs point to... probably. Did that help?

I have recently been pondering similar technology related hiccups in my own personal romantical life, and the problems that they can cause. While I love the immediacy and potential for playfulness afforded by texting, IM and email, there is definitely something missing. Something no emoticon or acronym can achieve, no matter how animated the smiley or confusingly long the acronym might be. How the reader of a text/IM/email interprets the message can depend on so many factors, like the nature of the message, or the readers mood, location, or state of intoxication.

Timing is an important aspect of these modes of communication. Remember letters and postcards? They take time to write and send. Then follows the anticipation of the reply. Dial-up Internet was like that... but in the world of 3G wireless and hi speed Internet, we have become impatient, expecting the immediacy of verbal exchange from the phone on which we are texting, without allowing the time to let the textual message sink in.

Most of the ideas, information and concepts we deal with daily only skim over our conscious mind, and for many people only elicit primarily knee-jerk reactionary exclamations - "LOL!", "ROFL!", "OMFG!". These formats are not always the most dependable for important, or time-sensitive information exchange... do that in person, or call. Don't expect too much, lest you be disappointed.

So - my answer: I think your guy friend has a point - not everyone treats texting the way you do, or I do, or your girl/guy friends do. Some people embrace immediacy in communication, and some don't. I have no qualms answering a text while I am in a meeting, at lunch or even riding my bike (I know, I know - que peligroso!), or having NSFW g-chat while working (this can be super hot, BTW). Some people refuse to do this, deeming it inappropriate or some hogwash. I have at least one friend that doesn't even own a cell phone (I know! GASP!), so if you are texting with him, well, you are going to be waiting even longer (and his wife would probably disapprove).

So maybe cut these guys some slack when they don't reply right away. Be patient, if it is important to you. Unfortunately, these days appearing aloof and uninterested can be code for "I like you", or just the transparent reality of ambivalence/disinterest. Confusing, right? For this, I have no answer or explanation other than to say that it sucks, but it seems to be true. Many of us get caught in the crossfire as casualties of the hipster war on everything.

Now, that said; you don't have to wait. Maybe I am reading into your question, but it seems you are fairly frustrated by the situation. I can not tell from your opening blanket statement about lack of effort = lack of interest, how many guys this might have happened with. If it is one or two that don't get back to you right away, it is probably them. If this happens all the time, there might be something going on.

* Your cell carrier might suck - I have had messages show up hours or even a day after I sent it (which got me in hot water, BTW). The cell providers prioritize phone calls over text transmissions, so the delivery speed can vary.

* You might be communicating with type-A guys (or forgetful stoners?), that are really busy (or really stoned?), and you are not high (heh) on their priority list (yet!).

* Are these guys "players", or juggling more than one woman?

* Is it you? Are you "dating up"? Are these guys stringing you along?

A list of excuses could go on, but the point is that maybe your expectations are (too?) high for the guys you are texting with - there are guys out there that might answer immediately, and take it a little more seriously. If immediacy in communication is that important to you, set that as a priority for potential future suitors - you will likely not be happy with a "slacker texter" in a relationship, and that could eventually drive a wedge between you. You might be a type-A texter. Accept it. Embrace it.

xoxo,
Dude

Dear Dude, I had an amazing conversation with a guy and afterward he told a mutual friend that he thought I was cool. But, now it is like he is ignoring me. I never get more than a quick hello. What is the deal?

Dear Damsel -

A couple things jump to the front of my mind:

* Mutual friend said something damaging (intentional or not)

* You said something damaging (intentional or not)

* You are "cool" but not his type

* He is seeing someone

* He is nervous/afraid/scared of being rejected

* He is a busy guy / bad timing

* You have a booger. Every time he sees you. Pick it, already!

xoxo,
Dude

What do you guys think? Good advice? Do you agree with The Dude? Any male readers out there who'd like to chime in?

It's Not Forever

Castles In The Clouds

When I was a child, I was fairly certain that one of the chief injustices in my life was A Total Lack of Castle. I did not have a playhouse built in the shape of a castle. I did not have a castle for my Barbies. Nor was there a castle for my My Little Ponies. !!!!

I know, right?

Obviously, my childhood was pretty rough. And when we went to Disney World? I decided that Cinderella's castle didn't count. I wanted the real deal.

So, you can imagine how I felt when I was 18 and spent a summer on an exchange program in Germany. I remember biking past the ruins of a castle on my way to school every day and immediately having to write home and tell everyone about it. There were turrets! And those little windows for cannons (or something)! And I bet there was probably a draw bridge that I couldn't see!

Were you into castles as a kid? Or, um, now?

Neroli Adorable!

Please say hello to another lovely Yes and Yes sponsor, Neroli Boutique!

Name?
Sarah Eastman - the store is Neroli Blossoms Boutique

Online haunts?
Besides the store, I have a blog and am on facebook.I'm also on twitter - although I usually get so distracted reading other people's tweets that I forget to write anything myself!

Awesome shop items?
There's a bunch of really cute clothing and stationary/gift items. We have a lot of the summer items on sale, and have some adorable fall dresses. There's also some jewelry and a lot of little gift items such as journals, cards, and writing tablets.

Favorite cheese?
Oh boy. I'm from Wisconsin where it is completely acceptable and encouraged to wear giant foam cheese hats, so I'm in the right place when it comes to my love of cheese. It's funny because when I was younger I HATED cheese, but now I pretty much love it. Gouda, asiago, mozzarella, Parmesan, cheddar, colby jack, american, swiss, brie...I could go on and on. Basically I love anything but blue/moldy/stinky cheese. The best stuff though? Deep fried cheese curds!

Sources of Inspiration?
I love browsing through etsy and looking through all the great flickr albums. I like design and fashion magazines and putting my own spin on things. Besides that, I really pull inspiration from anywhere, such as the changing of seasons, travels, or where I'm living at the moment. I also like looking to movies for inspiration - both the
costumes and art design.

Would you rather be a giant hamster or a tiny rhino?
Tiny rhino, no contest. I really don't like rodent-like things such as hamsters, guinea pigs, ferrets, etc. so I would probably scare myself to death if I ever saw my reflection. But all that aside, a tiny rhino would be awesome! It's cute and deadly!

Interested in ad space on Yes and Yes? Information and rates here!